I've got all these demons
Yurei
08-10-2020, 01:22 AM
(This post was last modified: 08-10-2020, 01:23 AM by Casso.)
He had already had a good enough motivation to go out and hunt for some kind of animal he could harvest for furs since his sleeping arrangement wasn't exactly comfortable without them and was making the ache in his shoulder return, but now that there was the possibility of Yurei staying there as well it became more of a case of need than want. Only the best would do for her so he intended to hunt until he had more than enough pelts to make the most plush bed possible. With the winters they would eventually need to deal with here they would certainly want them. At least the walls of the ship would protect from wind and snow - he was thankful for that at the very least. Finding a small herd of caribou to start out his hunt with was an easy enough task. They seemed to be fairly common around these parts at the very least. He hung back and watched them for a while from the shadows of the large trees that made up the Red Forest, making sure to keep himself down wind of the herd. His ruby and sapphire gaze kept drifting to the large, heavily antlered male that drifted around the herd, but logic told him that it would be a fool's errand. He'd just leave empty handed and angry with himself for trying it. It didn't stop the thrill chasing part of his mind from wanting it. Finally, he refocused his attention on a smaller female that was hanging toward the edge of the group. It still wasn't the easiest hunt to do on his own, but it was at least possible. It seemed like they were still regaining their weight from the previous winter so she was fairly thin. It also seemed like she had a bit of a limp so it felt like she would be by far the correct choice. He crept in a wide ark around the herd, giving them a wide birth so he wouldn't alert them to his presence too quickly. He reached a point where the female caribou would be within striking distance. Waiting until she was about as far from the rest of the herd as she was going to get, he darted forward with a vicious snarl. The ripple effect of fear through the herd was fast as they all took off running away from where he was and it left his target desperately limping after them and caused her to hang back away from the rest. It was easy to take his chance and made a smooth leap to latch his jaws onto her throat. His teeth sliced through flesh and she went stumbling to the ground with strangled, panicked bleats. A jerk of his head ripped her throat open and sent her blood spilling all over the ground and splashed a good bit of his across his neck and chest as well. It wasn't his cleanest kill, but it was quick and effective which was what he needed if he was going to be hunting alone. There was no one to make sure it didn't try to get up and run off while he made a neat kill. It was kind of a shame since he mostly just wanted it for its pelt, but it would still work fine. Getting the whole caribou back to the pack lands seemed like a difficult task on his own so he made the call to start dressing it here and just take back the pelt. He was sure the meat wouldn't go to waste - some other creature was sure to find it. He set to work methodically and carefully chewing a tear along the caribou's stomach and around each leg as he started to separate the largest continuous piece of skin away from his sides, back, and neck. It was slow work, but it was something he could focus and loose himself in. His mind began to wander and while that was normally a dangerous thing for someone like himself, the act of hunting and the tasks that came along with that helped to keep all those voices at bay. They simply became a quiet buzz in the background which was easy enough for him to ignore at this point. A sound similar to a grunt or snort pulled his eyes up from his work and he froze as his blood began to run cold. A black bear stood several feet away, clearly watching him and eyeing the caribou that he had just killed. It was thin and clearly had just recently emerged from its hibernation. He would have been happy to let it have the remains of his kill once he was done with it and perhaps if he had just continued on with his work it would have waited till he was done. However, the sight of the bear alone sent those lingering whispers and hums of his voices into a whirlwind. "Prove yourself! This is your chance to redeem yourself for your failure." No, absolutely not! he thought in return, but he could already feel his body tensing and heart racing as the adrenaline began to course through his system. Those vocal demons completely over run his thoughts and ignored his denial of their demands. "Fight! Prove that you're not worthless! You keep saying you're better than us, that you're going to silence us, that you hate us. You can't even pass this one test! How do you think you're going to be any better than you are now?! Prove that you're not SPINELESS!" "NO!" he yelled as his lips pulled back into a bloody snarl and his hackles bristled along his back. He couldn't even hear his own voice, all he could hear was them. The bear was immediately put on alert, assuming that his aggression was directed toward it. It rose onto its back paws and stood over him with a roar of its own. "DO IT, CASSO! DO IT! DO IT! FIGHT IT! NOW! PROVE IT!" He just wanted them to stop. He wanted it all to stop, all the voices, the panic that gripped him. He finally caved under their pressure and abandoned the caribou that he had been so carefully and peacefully dressing moments ago, leaping over its body as he went head first toward the bear. It swung it's large paw at him and he danced to the side to avoid its claws. He'd learned something from the first time he had tangled with a bear at least. He moved fast and with sank his teeth deep into the bear's hind leg, pulling a pained sound from it. He ripped and shook his head in frantic tugs at the limb to do as much damage as he could as the bear fell back down onto its front legs and twisted to swipe at him again. He released his hold on its hind leg jumped back out of the way again, but he wasn't fast enough he was never fast enough. Its claws clipped the side of his neck and left a trio of jagged cuts in their wake. They weren't nearly as deep or as damaging as the ones that had caused the scars that rounded his shoulder, but they were more than enough to draw blood and send his demons into an unroar. At this point he couldn't even make out a distinct word from them, it was just maddening screaming that made his head ache. He staggered backward, panting hard and trembling under the weight of his own furious panic. It was too late for him to back down now. He had to push forward, he had to do something. The bear turned to face him, but it struggled to put its weight on its hind leg with the damage he had done to it. That stumble was his opening and as the bear righted itself he jumped forward and bit deep into the ankle of its front leg, giving it the same treatment that he had its hind leg. The bear roared with anger and pain as Casso bit down to the bone. It swung the limb he was currently attached to in a desperate attempt to remove him from it, but for the first few shakes and swings he held firm. The bear finally swung hard enough to throw him into one of the large tree trunks near by, hitting his right shoulder hard. It was enough to force him to let go and fall to the ground like a rag doll. With its back and front limbs on its right side injured badly enough that it couldn't fully put its weight on them, it made it nearly impossible for the bear to move properly. It started to stumble and limp its way away from him, but it wasn't able to get very far. Casso pulled himself back to his feet, staggering for a moment as his already sore shoulder nearly gave out from under him with the impact it had just gone through. Once he was able to move well enough to catch up to it he ran to its right side, staying well away from the radius that it might have been able to reach with its left paw if it tried to do so. He sprang up onto his back legs and sank his teeth into the bear's neck, biting as hard as he could around its throat. After that things became a blur. He could taste its blood on his tongue, he could feel it struggle against him, but it felt like his whole body went into auto pilot. At some point after the bear hit the ground it made one last attempt at saving itself by swiping its powerful paw across his chest, but he barely felt it. Even as the blood began to pour from the wounds, his entire life's focus was on squeezing and ripping at this bear's throat. Eventually, it stopped moving and it still took him several long seconds before he let his jaws relax and release the bear's neck. He staggered back several steps before falling back onto his haunches. He stared at the bear he had just killed with dull eyes that seemed to be staring a thousand yards away. He was covered in blood - his own, the caribou's, and the bears. The cuts on his neck were still bleeding, but they were a small thing compared to the deeper lacerations that ran across his chest. His shoulder was radiating a dull, low ache from the impact he had with the tree. He was beat up, bleeding, panting as if he had just run a marathon, and his whole body was trembling with exertion, but there was silence. Blessed silence. That deep, unsettling panic that he now knew as a panic attack began to creep up his spine and force his whole body to tremble under the weight of it while the blood loss was beginning to make him a bit light headed. A harsh, sharp laugh left him and one laugh tumbled into another until he was shaking with mad, hoarse laughter. He'd done it. It was two years too late, but he'd completed the damned trial that his ancestors had expected of him and the demons were finally silent. They'd be back, he had no doubt about that. The constant, subtle buzz of their voices was still there, but gone were the taunts and the insults. He'd done what they wanted and for now they were satisfied. He'd lived up to the unrealistic expectations set upon him and now he was exhausted. |
