Old habits die hard

Azure shifted his large body to make room for his sister as she moved to the cow's face. It was a natural thing for them, a hobby they'd not shared together since they were very young. He paused in his own mutilation to watch hers, a small smile tugging at his lips as she patted the wounded animal's cheek. Her story was one he expected somewhat, knowing little of her situation but enough to know she too had been struggling. "I'm glad you got help." Az admitted after a moment, struggling to leave his apology unsaid that he was not the one there to support her.

"It's different, though. I've already spent time knowing myself. I know exactly who I am, and regardless of what I do next my path will not change. I will one day have my crown, that's what matters." His words were a soft murmur, though his paw spoke anger as he raked it down the flesh once more. The blood stained the white tips of his toes a sort of pinkish, and he took a moment to inspect them before continuing. "Hanako, she's a good wolf. She's risen fast in the Armada and father trusts her. She makes me feel powerful, and less alone. I'm happier around her, more relaxed." The words tumbled out before he could stop them, the admittance of being lonely not one he'd spoke aloud before.

"Venom, she offers me more. Taking the seat beside her as the Emperor would be reaching higher then my highest dream. Though the Empire is changing, Father is changing. I worry that while the title is loftier, that the choice would be the weaker one. The Armada is flourishing and I want to remain apart of it." His other feelings for Venom he left unspoken; the changes to his body were not something Az was prepared to find words for. "Or maybe I should just be alone forever, at least that way I'd have no complications to distract me." His head hung and his paw moved quickly to slash the throat of the cow before turning away from it. Today he had no interest in watching the life leave it's eyes.

Asla asked him what she could do to help, and Azure offered another short laugh. "I don't know, sterilize me?" Though he knew how supportive his sister could be in times of need and quickly turned to her and raised a claw to clarify. "Don't, actually, though." For all he knew she'd take his playful request in earnest and he'd find himself removed of his manhood right there and then.