Twenty Questions
Fel ♡
02-13-2021, 01:31 AM
The silver-gilded shadow of a woman laughed, the sound striking like a beautiful knell inside his soul. It was a lovely sound, one he adored and longed to hear in all its splendor once she was herself again. She spoke to him, her words affirming that she wanted him the way he was and she would never want him to be anything other than who he was. She desired him—his past, his present, and his future. Ah, but that was the problem, wasn't it? She wanted him to be a part of something he didn't know he ever could be. Her family, her pack... Abraxas and Aerie... It felt like trying to combine water and oil when he pictured himself involved in any part of her world beyond the little fantasy life they'd built for themselves with Sibyl. He had regressed from pack life. Could he truly ever be what she wanted and hoped for? Would Aerie even desire a wolf such as himself? He knew nothing of the enigmatic pack or the mysterious Abraxas family other than what he'd heard whispered on the lips of the others he'd crossed paths with. What if he didn't blend with them? Rejection was not something he was afeared of—it was the surrender of the familiar. His life was simple; every day was just another day to survive. Pack life meant existing for something more, something greater than himself. Was he selfless enough to give it another shot?
Azriel sat still and silent for a few moments, drinking in the words Fel spoke while he watched her from behind, considering her and her statements. Yes, he wholeheartedly agreed that the three of them could be a beautiful calamity the likes of which this world hadn't seen. Of this, the dark brute had no doubts. But to hear that others had potentially tried to harm her or take advantage of her in her diminished state tugged at the corners of his pursed mouth, a possessive anger flaring up within him. No one had any right treating her that way. He had been mulling over what she had said when he saw her skull cock a fraction of an inch until piercing silver-grey met blood ruby eyes. Their gazes locked, held in time and space, as if this moment could last an eternity until one of them willed it otherwise. Ah, but that was what he adored about her. Fel was so much more than just a wolf; she was an experience, an elemental force to be reckoned with, a whirlwind that threatened to sweep you off your paws plunge you into nirvana. The more time he spent with her, the more Azriel felt her becoming a necessary fixture in his life, like eating or breathing. As uncertain as the future made him feel, the thought of a future without Fel was a notion he could not even comprehend. No, that would not be something he could ever accept. He had his answer.
Rising to large paws and coming closer to the dainty, fragile-looking fae, Azriel would crane his neck down to snuffle his nose through the fur on her nape, ending with a lick to her crown if she didn't deny his affections. He had to show her he was all-in on them as well. This would be a partnership for them, equals in all rights. They would test and demand of one another nothing but the best, and they would elevate each other to higher planes of life and lust and greatness. With her and Sibyl, Azriel felt like a king among commoners, and he desired to make them feel like queens. "I chose you long before now, Fel," he replied, tones low and smooth, like the waves lapping at the onyx sands beneath their paws. He whispered almost directly into her black-furred ears, his words meant only for her and her alone. The world had no place in their interactions. "I hope one day to get to know you—all of you. But for now, I'm content to simply exist and live in this moment."
Oh, but there was still one more thing he had to get off his chest before he could be content. Fel had to understand where his reluctance to join Aerie came from so she didn't think it was from hesitation at being with her. "I don't know if I'm the right choice for Aerie, though. I was part of a pack before. Actually, I was born into one. It... didn't end well..." He paused, steely gaze moving back out over the shimmering water while a gust of sea breeze rippled his thick fur. "That pack no longer exists. I destroyed them when I found out they'd done something... something unforgivable to me. I did it all without any hesitation or regret. And it's because I did that so coldly I question if I'm right for your pack... or any pack."
"Speech" | Thoughts