Beating heart of stone

Allegro couldn't imagine not feeling how he currently felt, even as Aranea pleaded for him not to. He fought back the tears that welled up into his vision and squeezed at his throat as he wrestled with himself. Somehow he seemed to be incapable of throwing blame at anyone but himself. Logically he knew she was the one who had left him alone with their children, had been with this other man, and caused this divide, but no matter how much he would have liked to give himself any sort of slack he just couldn't. He couldn't even manage to blame the other male in the situation, whoever he was. He didn't know if it was her who had initiated the tryst or the other way around, but either way he only could imagine he had himself to blame.

He wouldn't move as she begged him to come to her, instead glancing away from her as she drew closer. Feeling her chest press to his hurt as much as a jab to the gut, but he couldn't force himself to pull away. The force of his own heart break felt like it was squeezing the air out of his lungs and made him feel as though he might implode under the pressure of his own emotions. He was quiet and still kept his head turned away from her as she spoke, still insisting that she was at fault and there was nothing that he could have done. That statement stung more than she probably intended for it to and it made him feel as if all the effort he had put in to keeping some semblance of a family life together for the children was all for nothing. He had done his best to keep them in good spirits so that whenever Aranea did come back into their lives she would be able to seamlessly join in on the family that she had left behind. Instead he felt like she had never intended on joining the family that he had raised without her and all the lonely nights he had spent without her were wasted.

He finally forced himself to turn his gaze to hers and his mismatched ears flicked back again, distraught pain lingering in his expression. "I thought... You said you just needed more time. I thought you might still..." Might still come to live with them in Abaven? That had been a pipe dream from the very beginning. He should have known that would never happen, but he still held out hope for ages and had only just recently begun to realize that it likely wasn't going to happen. He never breathed a word of his doubts to the pups though - he never did anything to tarnish her name in front of them... and look where that had gotten him. He sighed and looked away from her again, his voice barely a whisper as he added, "I don't... I don't understand... I... I loved you..."

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