Beating heart of stone

He hated how much he loved the feeling of her head on his chest and how it felt to finally hold her again. He hated that he felt so dependent on her when it didn't seem she was the same toward him. But, all the same, it was a relief when she agreed that she would come to live with them. He didn't really know if their relationship was salvageable at this point, but he was happy for their children. He was happy that he wouldn't be the only one responsible for their well being. Perhaps with enough time he could rebuild a bit of trust with her and at least feel amicable and allow himself to feel some of that connection that he felt with her again.

However, when he heard her "but" what hope he had allowed himself to begin feeling in that momentary silence fell away. She couldn't leave with them. He already knew what she meant when she mentioned things she needed to take care of first and it was hard to not feel disappointed, though he couldn't say he was surprised. He knew he needed to stop letting himself feel hopeful for anything until it proved to be true. "Alright," he agreed reluctantly. Silently he already began preparing himself for the possibility that she would never show and that more promises would be broken. This time he wouldn't go looking for her though - this was her chance, her one free ride for everything that had happened between them before now. He was willing to welcome her with open arms and wipe the slate clean once she crossed into Abaven, but only this one time. There was only so much more he could take.

He was quiet for a moment as he studied her face and wished that they could turn back the clock to the night that they had first enjoyed each other. Things had felt so simple and thrilling then. It had been the first time he had felt wanted or attractive to anyone and some small part of him wished that he had never indulged in that feeling because now he knew that he was missing. "I really have missed you," he said softly, his voice barely a whisper as he brought a gentle paw up to her cheek, brushing his claws through the fur there tenderly.

Walk | "Talk" | think