This Love, This Hate

*Alaria* · 07-29-2013, 09:43 PM

The beginning. The start of a new day, of a new life. Alaria padded slowly through this empty land, searching for what? She did not know. A home? No, too simple. Ria was filled with an anger to thirsty to quench. The fire lipped at her heart, yearning to break free. And once again, the young femme pushed it down, choosing to ignore the feelings raging through her vulnerable heart. Perhaps she was searching for an end to the miserable pain she had felt ever since the death of her adoptive mother. Not suicide; suicide was simply too permanent. And as desolate as Alaria was feeling, she was far too strong to ever feel like suicide was the only answer. Alaria shook her head aggressively, her triangular ears flopping on each side of her elegantly shaped head. She hated that she was even slightly weak enough to ponder these thoughts. Nobody ever knew the turmoil that seethed underneath Ria's skin, of course. To anyone who came in contact with her, Alaria was a snarky brat who needed an attitude adjustment. Few could dig themselves under her skin, but when they did, they saw a completely different side of Alaria, one that she kept locked away close to her heart.

Taking a deep breath, Alaria flopped herself down onto a large, flat rock to soak up some of the sun's blistering rays. It was a beautiful spring day, the sky a clear, cloudless blue, slowly fading to pinks and oranges as the sun began to set. The temperature itself was not that high, but Alaria was panting in her thick coat. She rolled over onto her back so as to block the sun from heating the ebony fur that hugged her slender body like a cloak. The soft white of Ria's underbelly absorbed much less heat, effectively cooling her down. As she lay there, amber eyes glinting in the fading sunlight, Alaria watched an eagle soaring through the sky. The majestic bird hardly flapped, flying through the sky with minimal effort. Alaria's eyes followed the eagle as it circled, her ears listened as it screeched. Suddenly the bird swooped down, diving towards the ground at almost a ninety degree angle. Awed by the majesty and grace, Alaria rolled over and jumped to her feet in one swift movement. She raced off, hoping to meet the eagle is it landed.

Alaria was not sure what she was running for, or running towards. All she knew was that she had to see that eagle up close. Her wolf eyes saw the predatory bird clearly and in perfect detail, but Ria wanted, no, needed more. As a wolf of less brute force and more speed and cunning, Alaria raced across the plain at speeds most wolves would give their left ear to possess. That was one of the few attributes that Ria liked about herself; her speed. Her finesse. Her quick reaction time and sly cleverness. All related to speed. Within seconds, Alaria met the eagle. And for a few precious, time-stopping seconds, they made eye contact. In those few seconds of staring into the sharply golden eyes of a god on the wing, Alaria saw infinity. She saw the endless azul of the open sky, the tiny specks below her that were prey and predator alike. Then the moment was over, and the eagle snatched up the mouse it had been targeting and swooped back into the sky. Ria skidded to a stop, her haunches dragging in the sandy soil, throwing up a cloud of choking dust. Blinking her amber orbs against the grains of dirt, Alaria waited for the cloud to clear. When it did, Ria looked up, but the eagle was gone. But where there had been something missing in Alaria's heart, there was something new. There was hope.

I never meant to be so cold

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