Scars without and within

Even though she had offered to explain anything he wanted to know, she was silently glad when he said it could wait. Everything was still so fresh, so painful. She kept trying to push herself further because that was the only way she had been able to deal with her trauma after escaping her family, but it felt worse this time. Resin had been one of the ones to help her heal and now she had been torn away from her in the most abrupt, violent way she could have imagined. Her ears flicked when he mentioned that he had seen just seen Resin with Art and actually felt guilty over the hit of jealousy that she felt over the fact that Rudyard and Artorias had seen Resin while she hadn't. She knew that the boys shouldn't have been down there, but she wanted to see Resin with every fiber of her being and the fact that they had spoken to her while she hadn't been allowed to hurt her more than she expected.

She blinked her eye open as he apologized for not being able to fix this, listening to him speak of protecting her, protecting their family. She wrapped her forepaw around his leg, holding on to him gently while she continued to lean her head into him. She didn't want her children to feel like they had to protect her. She should be the one protecting them - not the other way around. For their whole lives Resin had been the protector, she had been the caregiver. They had worked well together, but now she needed to be both. Somewhere from these shattered pieces of herself, she would have to figure out how to be both. Until they got Resin back... if they ever did... she would have to be both for her children.

"You don't have to protect me," she insisted quietly as she lifted her head, turning her gaze toward him with a soft, sad smile. "I've been through a lot... This... This might be the worst thing of them all, but... I'll be alright. I don't you or your siblings to worry about me. It's my job to worry about you." She squeezed his leg gently, leaning up to press her nose to his cheek. "But... I know you'll protect us. You and your siblings... You've all gotten so big. It feels like just yesterday that you were just a little ball of fur." She allowed a little grin to pull at her lips, looking at him adoringly as she thought back to those much happier times. "A little speckled fluff... so full of energy and always finding trouble."

"Tamsyn" | "Blue"