Fighting my way out

Tamsyn grappled around Sirius' neck, digging her teeth into his skin till she tasted blood, though it was nearly impossible to get a firm hold on him around his insufferable fur. She felt blinded by it all, lost in her own pursuits to escape her own emotions, and barely noticed when his foreleg wrapped around her tightly and held her smaller frame against his own. All at once the world shifted around her as he drove them both into the ground. Her back hit squarely against the hard stone floor of the castle and all of the air went rushing out of her lungs. Her head fell back away from his neck with a grimace, laying flat on her back under him while she struggled to work air back into her lungs. She was breathing hard and staring past him up at the ceiling for a long moment, the drive and the anger slowly simmering and seething just under the surface.

Eventually she sighed and let her eyes close, a few remaining, frustrated tears running down the sides of her face as she hit his shoulder with her paw. "Why?" she asked softly, her voice breaking and hoarse as she continued to try and catch her breath. "Why me? Why us? Haven't we been through enough already?" She didn't expect an answer, she just had to demand it of the universe even if it couldn't speak back. The fight was over, she had lost, much like she had expected to. She didn't need to win. She just needed to know that she could fight. Needed to remind herself. She didn't want to give up, which was really all she had thought of doing since Resin attacked her. She had slid right back into that place she had been when Zee had found her skirting along the edge of a cliff, but she couldn't stay in that place. She had to think about her children. They needed her, even if she didn't want it for herself.

She blinked her eyes open and looked up at Sirius' face for a moment before leaning forward to press her forehead to his. Her neck was bleeding, some parts of the wounds around her eye had torn open, and she was utterly exhausted. Gwynevere would certainly chew her out for such a stunt and the thought made a little smirk pull at her lips. She didn't know if she necessarily felt any better, but she felt alive and that had to count for something. "Thank you," she told him quietly.

"Tamsyn" | "Blue"