Loyalty burns both ways

Exhaustion and restlessness weighed on her in equal measure. She had never been good at staying in one place for long, but all the days she had spent over the last couple of weeks tied to a healer's bed were maddening. Her mint eyes were glued on the entrance to the den, peering at the covering with her heart beating anxiously at her chest. In the quiet of the den her mind was allowed to run rampant, replaying every moment from when she went to bed the night before the attack to now. Every moment felt so vivid, so real, but somehow they also felt like it couldn't be real at all. It all went against everything else she had ever believed to be true. Resin couldn't hurt her. Resin couldn't be slipping away from her. Sirius couldn't hurt her. Sirius couldn't hate her. Zee couldn't be dead. None of it made sense.

Ever since she woke up after making it back to the Armada with Sirius and the remains in tow, it felt as if something was gripping on to the back of her neck. The muscles around her neck and shoulders refused to relax no matter how hard she tried. This anxiety only worsened when Sirius was out of her sight, but when he was with her it only changed forms. It felt like she was just waiting for everyone around her to start flipping switches and completely changing themselves from how she had always known them. Who would be next? Ulric? Rudyard? Artorias? A shuttering sigh left her, swallowing hard as she forced herself to rest her head on her paws, still unable to let her eyes leave the den's entrance, while she did her best to relax the hard tenseness in her jaw.

When she heard someone entering the den she finally turned her gaze away, quickly looking off toward the other side of the den as Sirius slipped inside. Her chest squeezed when he spoke her name with a rough voice, her ears flicking back toward him. She wanted to be mad at him. She wanted to be furious for how he had treated her and for what he had done. But she couldn't. She didn't have it in her. She was too tired, too worn down. There was no room for anger when everything was drowned out by anxiety, worry, and fear. She felt his presence lingering over her and felt his blue gaze tracing her wounds and she let him. Even if she couldn't feel the anger she so desperately wanted to feel, she wanted him to at least know and understand what he had put her through. "Sirius," she replied softly, finally turning her head to look at him with an uncertain glance.

"Tamsyn" | "Blue"