I'm here to make the understatements

She smiled softly and nodded to his promise, knowing it was true, before his gaze turned away from hers. It still hurt to be with him, but not as much as it did to be alone. It was like picking the lesser of two evils and in this case facing him so soon after humiliating herself and breaking her own heart had been the one she had chosen. It was that or continue to be frozen by fear in the corner of the dungeons while her mate spiraled even deeper into this madness that was consuming her whole, twisting her into something that she hardly recognized. If it wasn't for the recognizable scars that she had traced with her paws and kisses time and time again and the distinctive markings that she could pick out from the largest crowd she never would have believed it was ever her Resin.

She looked at the dungeon door again, letting her heartbreak and sorrow distract her from Sirius' presence at her side and the words that continued to float through her mind from the last time they spoke. Fierce, platonic love. I do love you, or I could have... She pushed them away. Not now. Not ever again. She had drawn lines, she needed them to hold true. Right now it was about Resin. "I want to be with her... at the end," she told him, leaving her gaze on the door. It was coming, sooner than they'd like. "I know she won't know who I am, I know she's just going to howl and flail whenever she forgets I'm there and then realizes it again, but... I can't just... I can't just let her die down there alone. In this awful, awful dungeon." Her voice cracked and choked at the end, her ears folding back against her skull.

"I hate this. I hate that it ever happened, I hate that I can't fix it. I hate that I can't help her. She helped me so much and I... I can't do anything." She grit her teeth, falling into the frustration and helplessness she had been pushing down in the days since he left. She hated how vulnerable he made her feel, but she also didn't know who else she could ever say this stuff to. If she never told him it would just fester and burn her alive. "Now I can't even manage to be with her on my own to do the one kindness I can think of doing for her in these last days..." She turned away from him and the dungeons, stalking off toward the courtyard, fuming with anger and frustration at everything and nothing all at once.

"Tamsyn" | "Blue"