i met you in the dark

A smile tugged at Segin’s lips at Indigo’s request, chuckling softly at the incredibly sweet, selfless answer. “Well, I can certainly give you that,” he agreed, reaching up to give his cheek another gentle kiss. There had to be something more he could do, but for now he was happy to at least give him this small thing. It was easy to do anyway while being held tightly against his chest. He didn’t really understand what it meant to feel safe, but the longer he laid here with the tension falling away from his shoulders and a genuine smile pulling at his lips he thought maybe this was what it was like. He didn’t feel like he constantly had to be looking over his shoulder like he once had and there was no need to worry about if he would still be alive tomorrow. He knew that there was something to look forward to now, a little bit of hope that did wonders for the hopeless man.

Curiosity pulled at his expression when Indigo began to speak, telling him that they were similar, making his head tip slightly to the side. He couldn’t imagine how he and this wonderful man could be alike, but he was quiet and listened anyway, the truth soon revealing itself. Indigo loved his sister, just as Segin had loved Cygnus. Understanding and sympathy immediately filled his silver gaze, his ears falling back against his head when he heard how his father forbid them from being together. He nodded quietly, understanding the feeling of being torn apart from the one you loved, whether it was his sibling or not. He had learned very quickly that the heart didn’t understand these things. It loved whoever it wanted to love whether it was convenient or not. A piece of himself had died with Cygnus, just as a piece of Indigo would forever be held by his sister. Perhaps they were more similar than he could have imagined.

Hearing him explain how much it meant to him to just have someone with him, to not be alone, to be able to help the broken ones like him… He understood how just seeing him smile could be repayment for all of his kindness. Segin still wanted to do more, still wanted to find a purpose for him, but it made more sense now. He smiled a sad smile when Indigo squeezed him tighter, returning the nuzzle he gave his cheek, leaning into his touch. “I understand,” he replied as their gazes met again, one of his paws coming up to rest gently on Indigo’s cheek. “I’m sorry that you have to feel that pain. I… I know it’s not easy.” The sound of his father cursing them and tearing them apart for their love still rang in his ears - though he wasn’t sure what his father had hated most, the fact that they were half brothers or the fact that they were men. Either way, it had only ended in death. “I’m glad that you found a purpose in helping wolves like me though. I’m glad you have something that brings you even a little comfort. Someone as genuine and kind as you deserves every ounce of love the world can give to you.”

Segin had found his own comforts in the days that followed him leaving his former home, comforts that were far less healthy or kind to himself, but even those had been fleeting as his body continued to deteriorate. He let himself fall into such disrepair that no one wanted him, but he hadn’t connected those two things in his mind. Now that Indigo had allowed him a bit of hope to settle his pained mind he could see the truth of it, but at the time it had only felt like more pain, more rejection, which led to him falling into a deeper and deeper spiral. He was lucky and grateful that Indigo had been there to catch him before he landed at the bottom.

As they laid there, sapphire eyes looking into silver, he was sorely tempted to give into his only mechanisms to cope. He briefly glanced at Indigo’s lips before he forced himself to look away, tucking his head into Indigo’s chest again instead, curling up tight in his embrace. He was already afraid that he had been too forward with his affections as it was and he was desperate to not push Indigo away. He needed this violet gentle giant as much as he needed a meal to eat. He allowed him to feel like he could breathe and he couldn’t go without that again, at least not until he found his own feet under him again. There was also a fear of that rejection deep in his core that he wasn’t strong enough to face. He let his eyes close for a moment, trying to ignore how well he fit into Indigo’s form.