I keep trying, I don't know what for

Tamsyn could see the anger in his expression that she had expected to see when she looked up at him. From their time together she had picked up on how protective he was so it certainly wasn't surprising to see him be angry at how she had been treated and talked to. For the most part Tamsyn blamed herself. She had been too blinded by her loyalty to the wolf that had pulled her out of the depression that had nearly killed her and gave her the tools to defend herself and the confidence to live her own life to see the destructive, abusive nature of her and Sirius' relationship. She still cared about her stupid, possessive bastard of a friend and it just kept hurting her. Somehow she couldn't manage to completely untangle her life from his no matter how hard she tried. Perhaps it was her experiences with Sirius and his rash behavior that made her worried that Kane might rush off to attack the Warlord, but he didn't. He surprised her by leaned down and kissing her forehead and telling her that he was going to take her to bed. She blinked with surprise and before she could respond she was being scooped off her feet.

She sputtered in shock for a moment, a grin pulling across her features despite the ache that still lingered in her chest. She caught his glance back over his shoulder at her as he began to carry her into the castle. He might have the same build and stature and fangs as Sirius, but he couldn't be more different. She sighed and chuckled at this ridiculous, caring man and shifted on his back till she could wrap her forelegs around his neck and hold herself tight to him, burying her face into his scruff, the feathers woven into his fur flicking against her neck in the breeze. She started to think about what she might have done or what she might have been like if their paths had never crossed and it was a dark trail that she didn't want to go down. She had no doubt that she would still be pining after Sirius, still aching and torn apart from losing Resin, slipping further and further into her deadly, suicidal thoughts. He kept her afloat, gave her a friend to lean on, gave her someone to love. She kept her self hidden away from the world in his thick, warm scruff until she heard him open and close the door to his room and she loosened her grip on him so that he could toss her onto the bed.

She giggled as she fell into the now familiar pile of furs and bedding, grinning up at Kane with grateful love in her mint eyes. She shifted over into her usual spot and settled herself into the pillows while she waited for Kane to join her on the bed. As soon as he was laying down with her she was quick to snuggle into his embrace, pressing herself into his chest and hiding away from the world that had been all too cruel to her. In Kane's arms she felt safe and it allowed some of that stress to melt away from her shoulders as she tried to push it all to the back of her mind, far out of reach. A sad smile pulled at her lips when he spoke of how Sirius hadn't deserved her loving heart, though he wouldn't see it with how her head was tucked into his neck. Perhaps he was right, but it was her loving heart that had made her so determined to save the Fatalis man. He had saved her so she had wanted to save him in return. She thought that maybe she had once he began to reincorporate himself into his family after Zee's death, but she had been wrong. He only slipped even further away into madness. She was going to have to cut her losses if she was ever going to save herself and Kane gave her the strength to do it.

She was quiet for a while, holding onto him and savoring his warmth and how his larger form hid her away from the outside world, listening to his heartbeat and his breathing and letting it soothe her. Kane was quickly becoming home to her and she very rarely felt as at peace as she did when they were together. She would forever long and ache for Resin and perhaps a small part of her would always care for Sirius, but Kane represented hope in her mind and that fresh, new love was intoxicating and breath taking in the most wonderful way. Tamsyn eventually lifted her head from his fur enough to be able to look up into those hazel eyes that had caught her attention from the very beginning and a smile pulled across her lips. She was exhausted form the emotional toil of the last couple of days and from the tournament fights she had been in, but she still didn't feel like she could sleep. She tipped her muzzle up to his, catching his lips with hers and giving him a slow, tender kiss that just barely began to scratch the surface of how thankful she was that he was with her. When their kiss eventually broke she opened her eyes again, looking into the eyes of the man she was quickly falling in love with.

"Kane..." she said softly against his lips, her heart fluttering in her chest as her paws slipped around his neck so that she could pull herself tighter against him. It should probably be the last thing she wanted after everything she had just been though in the last day or two, but she wanted him and the escape he offered. She wanted how good he made her feel and to be able to forget everything else. She brushed her muzzle against his while her claws trailed down the back of his neck, that deep desire and need for him that never really went away easily being sparked to life. "I just... I just want to forget any of this ever happened... Will you help me forget...?" she asked in a quiet whisper before she pressed her lips to his once more, molding herself to him and losing herself in the pleasures and desires that could wipe away the pain in her soul even for just a night.

Tamsyn Carpathius