Douse This Fire

The disappointment on his face was palpable. The way his eyes seemed to darken and his smile drooped from his lips as his mood deflated made her feel like the bad guy somehow in this scenario. But that was ridiculous! He was the one that had stalked her down to the falls alone, no doubt tracking her by her intensified fragrance, the perfume of pheromones surely drugging him and making him unstable. But he didn't seem unstable... Ezra must have been a tremendous actor. No, no that was even sillier. Ezra was a dopey buffoon, not some sort of wicked mastermind. So what the fuck was he doing here?! The panic and paranoia didn't help her rationality any, and Syanna was only barely paying attention to Ezra while he explained that he had followed her to make sure things between them were okay and see how she was liking pack life. That was why he had tailed her like this? Gods, he really was a simpleton, wasn't he?

He turned to leave, and Syanna found herself feeling even worse knowing she'd hurt his feelings. Part of her wanted him to leave—that traumatized, paranoid part of her that wanted nothing more than to wait out this season in isolation—but a greater portion felt terrible for treating him like a criminal and assuming the worst of him. Ezra had done nothing to provoke that fear, and yet she couldn't control herself. She was just too scarred to let anyone in close, least of all now that she was in heat. Fuck you for doing this to your only friend, Syanna. Fuck you for being so weak and stupid. Syanna gave a frustrated shake of her head and growled at herself.

"Ezra, wait!" she shouted after the dire brute so he could hear her over the falls, taking a couple steps closer until her toes touched the edge of the water. She still hadn't convinced herself to go back around to be closer to him yet, but she would be damned if she let her fear drive away the only wolf that had ever given a damn about her. "Ezra, I... I'm sorry. I don't mean to be standoffish. Yes, we're good, and no you didn't do anything. It's me. I..." I'm afraid you'll try to rape me too. "...Never mind. I'm really, really happy that you're better and moving around again."

She managed a more genuine smile up at him; that part was at least wholly truthful. She'd been worried sick over him all through the weeks of his recovery after the saber cat attack, praying nightly that he would survive. She'd run herself ragged making sure he was tended to and that any medicines he needed were procured. "I really have been keeping myself busy getting medicines for Gwyn, trying to be helpful. I didn't mean to be avoiding you." She knew she had to make this right, but the only thing she could think of was exactly what that primal fear in the back of her mind was screaming at her not to do. Taking a shallow breath to try and steel her nerves, she looked back up at Ezra and asked, "Would you like to stay and help me? Maybe make sure no more big cats try to make a meal out of me?"

"Syanna Alluráin"