You're At The End Of The Road

He had a hard time really reading either of his siblings at first. He avoiding eye contact or looking at them too hard. He had been strong with Azzurra, but he was at his weakest then. He held his emotions in hard, but he wanted to still try and be stronger for Solo and for Psalm. He believed, at least in the eyes of Allegro, that being the man of the denhold was put on his shoulders. It was nothing against his brother, at least from his own heart and mind. It may have been different through Allegro though but it seemed they would never know. So while Solo was feeling harsh at first, like he wasn't good enough, like Balthier had been chosen as the favorite in their father's eyes, Balthier didn't notice while looking away from them.

He was surprised though when Solo had came forward with support instead of turning sour to the whole situation. Was that a sign of good raising or a sign of trying to make things better from the neglect of both of their parents? He didn't know. Him and his siblings had been a quiet family along with their father. He didn't know if they felt the same way, but Balthier had never really felt right here in Abaven. He felt like he had never belonged, even though they were surrounded by a big, friendly family. He wagged his tail slightly as Solo came forward to him, a gentle smile on his maw while his brother made him comfortable enough for him to look up into his own eyes. He couldn't really agree that they didn't need their father. He would hide the thought, but they had already lost their mother long before all this. So losing their father was something they definitely did not need to add to their pile of rejection and insecurities.

This was when he noticed Psalm's devastated stature and emotions. His slightly happy, foreseeing future expression had changed instantly. He couldn't match the way she felt completely, at least not physically. But when he moved forward to comfort her, she was gone. He wanted to hold her like he did with Azzie, make her feel like she was wanted and needed. He felt this way about all his siblings. He felt like they were all he had. He had always been detached from the other Destructions aside from Poem and her family. He wanted to be there, he wanted to make all the bad go away. He couldn't do it all, not for everyone, not all at once. It made him feel weak and like a failure. It was becoming one thing after another now. Aranea, Allegro, he felt like it was a matter of time before he lost either Solo or Psalm, Psalm was falling further from his reach right now.

He turned to Solo with a glance, his expression disappointed in himself for what he couldn't do, even if it wasn't really his fault as Solo tried to make them believe. He lifted his paw up to Solo's chest only if he went to go after Psalm, "Give her a minute to herself to sort things out." They were all the closest wolves to each other. They needed each other, but he wanted Psalm to get her more harsh emotions out before either one of them tried to comfort her. "Dad..." He sighed, should he even call him that anymore? "Filled our storage with meals for a while. Take some time to yourself for now. I can help you when you are ready. I'm sure Corvus and others from the pack will too." He turned away, going back to his secluded, no contact self as he went towards their father's den to see what all he had left behind and get things organized. Allegro had made them comfortable for the next few seasons, so they had time to work things out and keep themselves lifted with the help of the pack when they were ready.

"Balthier"