what hurts the most

He knew what this meant, knew what this would do to her. He had been through it himself, losing the one who meant the world to you, who you felt like was truly your other half. Sirius had been her best friend and guardian for so long. He said her name and it felt like a punch to her gut more than the word of an understanding friend. He knew how she felt, but he had his wife to return home to, she had nothing. There was nothing left for her. Her children were nearly grown, and what heart she hadn’t given to Sirius had long been given fully to them. She could return to them a shell of herself, a shadow of a woman.

She was hardly thinking when her delicate paws brought her closer to him. ”I know,” she told him softly, finding there was no blame and no jealousy in her voice. What was would be, she was powerless to change the course of the world, nor would she want to. She had always been the second choice, even with Zee dead.

Deathbelle seated herself before him, leaving only a paws width between them. Her royal purple gaze couldn’t be brought to his sapphires as she moved. She didn’t want to see the emotions that lay there, the pity that would be in his eyes. ”I gave you my life,” she reminded him as she tilted her head back and slowly lifted her chin. Revealing the soft fur of her throat and the vulnerable line of her pulsing jugular vein. ”That isn’t something that can be returned.” She barely breathed as she spoke to him. ”Give me a collar or give me my final relief.” She asked with silent sobs on her lips.

Deathbelle belonged to him, there was no life without him now. She wanted him to take her as the possession she had become, or end the eternal suffering this life was for her.