wishing death upon a fallen star

Through his foggy brain, he almost couldn't comprehend the words coming out of Dime's mouth. How did he know? The wolf standing before him was so familiar but unfamiliar at the same time. Paranoia tickled the back of his brain as the voices screeched at him to listen. Half of them wanted him to stop and run, to not harm his friend. The other half continued insisting that he spill blood. Gil's face contorted into a picture of agony. "Friends," was the only word he could get out of his mouth as he stepped back again. "No, no, no," he whispered under his breath as he shook his head wildly.

Lunging forward, teeth clacking together loudly, he stopped feet from Dime. "I said no!" Gil shouted at himself, lowering his head to the ground in a bow. Covering his face with his paws as he smooshed more ooze into his eyes. "Can't hurt you," he mumbled, his whole body shaking as he fought back the erratic thoughts that urged him to inflict pain. Clawing at his cheeks, trying to force himself to feel something other than the sickness that took over his body, Gil looked up at Dime with wide yellow eyes. "Please, just end me," the words left his mouth before he could register what he said.

Of course, he didn't want to die so why did he say it?


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