I Love You, Flaws and All

Manea didn’t answer him right away. She was considering his words, his concerns, his fears, and Alastor appreciated that. If she had just denied him and claimed he wasn’t dangerous or the way he was was fine, he would have known she was lying to try to make him feel better. Instead, when she did speak, she reminded him of all the ways he counteracted that demented side of him. She pointed out the way he behaved around the band and her family, how he cared for and loved their children. She didn’t disregard his ruthless and violent side; she embraced it alongside everything else he was.

Stygian eyes slowly closed, letting darkness swallow his vision. He’d beaten himself down so much over the way he’d harmed Relm and Manea, afraid that he’d irreparably destroyed the relationships he held with both wolves. It was terrifying being trapped inside his own brain and being forced to watch while he did awful things to them. But he knew he couldn’t control himself, he knew he was dangerous to be around. Inevitably, anyone who stayed near him got hurt sooner or later. Yet Manea was still choosing to stay.

She squeezed his foreleg and Alastor’s eyes slowly opened once more, peering into Manea’s gaze so full of love and devotion. Were he capable of crying, he might have then and there. "I love you too," he repeated back to her as truthfully as the first day he’d spoken those words to her. A colossal black paw came up to gently caress Manea’s cheek, feeling the warmth of her under his touch. It was such a strange and intoxicating power to feel, knowing that depending on if the threads of his mind were together or not, this paw could be stroking his wife’s cheek or it could be squeezing the last remnants of life from her body while it crushed her throat.

"I’m so sorry, Manea. I never want to hurt you. I wish I could tell you I’ll never do it again, or that I’ll stop myself, but…" A small rueful grin touched his lips while he knocked on the side of his head with his paw. "...I’m not all together up here." That didn’t mean he wouldn’t keep trying for her. By the gods, how he’d always done and would continue to always do his best for his heart, his life, his soul.

"Alastor Mendacium"