Break Away

Azzurra didn't really know what to expect from Erys for a response as she spilled out her inner turmoil that she hadn't been able to discuss with anyone else before now. She couldn't discuss it with Balthier because the one time she tried it had ended in a fight that had made her whole world turn upside down. Now she was just doing everything in her power to maintain the status quo so she wouldn't risk losing him. As painful as everything was and as uncertain as she felt about everything in her life, Balthier had been her only constant through every loss and every struggle. Losing him now, even if it might benefit her in the long run, felt more difficult than living in this state of uncertainty and anxiety. Still, while she here with Erys in the quiet of the night while she tried to cope with her overwhelming emotions, she realized it was actually nice to be away from her brother for a bit and have an open ear to speak to.

She appreciated the feeling of his paw holding hers like a tether to keep her grounded and when his other foreleg slipped around her shoulders she thought she might just crumble apart. His kind advice was honest and it was what she already knew was true even if she didn't want to accept it. If it didn't feel right then it probably wasn't, but she also didn't know how to fix it. She felt trapped and in search of a way out that she didn't even know if she would take if it was offered to her. Azzurra leaned into Erys' embrace, struggling and failing to keep the tears that had been forming in her eyes from falling. His assurances that she deserved everything good made her already overwhelming emotions feel like they might bubble over and she shifted in his embrace to press her face to his chest, hiding in his soft, white fur like she might be able to hide from the world there. But, just like every other way she had attempted to cope, it didn't make the emotions go away and it just left her with nothing to do but face them.

Her paw pulled away from his as she slipped her forelegs around him to hug herself tight to him. Even though they were still little more than strangers she felt like she could trust him and she gravitated toward his gentle demeanor, his kindness feeling like a salve on a wound. For a little while all she could really do was cry into his chest, letting out all of the pent up confusion, hurt, guilt, and longing. When she was finally able to get her quiet sobs to dissipate, she gave a shaky sigh and gave him a grateful squeeze with a silent thank you. She felt so terribly guilty for disrupting his evening and unloading her trouble and trauma onto him when he very much didn't ask for any of it, but she couldn't express how much she had needed this and how thankful she was to him for allowing it to happen.

She was quiet for a little while until she was able to calm down enough that she was confident her voice wouldn't break when she tried to speak. Being so pressed against him like this, it was hard to keep her mind from wandering back to the topic that had prompted this spiraling and break down to begin with. Purging the clouded, painful emotions had only left her more raw and open than before and let the other needs that hadn't been fulfilled come even more strongly to the forefront. "Erys..." she said softly as she lifted her head to look up at his face tentatively. It was difficult to get the words out, but she reassured herself that even if he turned her down at least he would be kind about it. She leaned her muzzle toward his, but she kept herself from actually touching her lips to his. "I just want to feel good... even if its just for a little while." Her face flushed even as she managed to say what she wanted. "I... I understand if you don't want to, but... if you do..."

"Azzurra"