To Seek The Pale Enchanted Gold

One wolf was easier to deal with than many, and honestly, Gloom was doing amazingly, at least for who she was. She hadn't dropped to her stomach and started bawling yet at least. It probably helped that the other woman mostly seemed wholly relaxed, unconcerned with her presence beyond being polite enough not to ignore her. It helped to make Gloom feel like she wasn't having everything she did scrutinize. (Which as a point of fact was usually true but certainly didn't feel so to her.) Her posture relaxed some, though she was clearly still alert, even if her gaze hardly moved from the floor for the time being. She nodded as Pitch spoke, from the lilt of her voice and the way certain words sounded on her tongue Gloom could have probably guessed that Pitch was not from Boreas originally but she certainly wouldn't have said it aloud.

Then Pitch tossed her a few questions, the first two were easy enough, but her follow-up gave Gloom some pause. She looked at the fire between them as she spoke. "Honestly I would." While her tone was soft her words held a conviction that would have surprised most who knew the girl. "Abaven has always been a family pack, far as I know but recently our leader has shifted focus to be more of a school, she wants to provide a space for wolves who want to learn, a neutral space." Gloom considered for a moment, Theory's plan had come too late in her life, but she could see how this direction could have saved her when she was a child, lost, alone and slipping through the cracks. "As to why I want to leave..." Gloom wasn't leaving, not yet, maybe not ever if she couldn't buck up and just tell her cousin she wanted to leave. Lavander and sky gaze turned to her paws again and her voice grew more timid. "I don't think I'm cut out for pack life. I get so nervous around others, it's like I can feel their gazes drilling into me." A tiny smile pulled at her lips as she spoke the next words: "Out of packlands, away from everyone I just feel like I can actually... Breathe? I don't know, I've never known life away from my family, and Abaven is lovely but I see everyone I know getting on with their life and I feel stuck, I want to not feel so alone, I want what everyone else seems to get so naturally. Being away, it's the only time I feel capable."

Gloom stared at her paws for a while longer. That was probably more than anyone ever wanted to hear from her and here she was just dumping it all on a total stranger. "This is the first time I've ever held a conversation with anyone who wasn't family. Ever!" Her voice was softer still, hitching slightly as she felt shame settle over her. "Usually I just break down in a panic."

"Speech"