Shattered

While he tried his best to comfort the hysterical Bowen, Artorias exchanged the confused and concerned look Briar was giving him. She didn't know what to do and neither did he. He didn't want her to leave though, that much he knew. He wouldn't ask Briar to leave their own space. More than anything, he needed his fiancée's support while he held his sobbing sister, completely bewildered and unsure how to proceed. Gradually Bowen began to settle enough to where she could speak, finding her voice just as Briar offered to get Gwynevere. "That might be a good ide-" he began to say, but Bowen cut in and begged them not to get Gwyn. He shot a stunned look to Bo, flabbergasted by her refusal of help. For a split second, he considered overruling her objection; he was the Aegis after all, and it was his duty to make sure all of his wolves were cared for and protected. Bowen was making that exceedingly difficult for him to do when she wouldn't accept any aid for whatever was ailing her.

"I'm not going anywhere," he replied when Bowen pleaded for him to stay, running a large azure paw up and down her back to try and soothe her ragged breathing. Then the caramel and cream fae finally told him what had caused her emotional state. She'd seen Resin in her dreams. Artorias' heart stopped beating for a moment as visions of the dreamlike world he'd encountered not long ago flashed in his brain. Bowen began describing what she saw, but Artorias already knew. He'd been there as well. Up in the mountains. A winter lake. "Frozen over in thick ice, surrounded by dead leaves..." he murmured, finishing her sentence with another detail only they would know. Bowen declared that Resin was disappointed in her and Artorias squeezed his little sister tighter in his embrace, as if he could chase away her demons with how tight he held her. But he couldn't. He just... couldn't.

Bowen gasped through her sobbing and apologized, but Artorias shook his head. She had nothing to apologize for, and he wouldn't accept her blaming herself further. "Bowen..." Artorias began to speak, but the tiny russet fae stole his words away when she stated that she needed to leave. Artorias drew back from Bowen, the look on his face as if she had slapped him with her words. His mouth hung open in silent shock, his heart wrenching in his chest. The Carpathian's first impulse was to deny her, to tell her she was wrong and that whatever she was going through they could work through it here, together, as a family. But the sorrow in Bowen's emerald eyes told him that her mind had already been made up. She wasn't going to accept help from him, or Gwyn, or any of their healers or family. Bowen was shutting herself out and no matter how much he fought against it, he had no say in the matter.

"Bowen..." Artorias repeated, his voice notably harder now and edged with pain. It was useless. He was helpless to save his sister yet again. But this time it wasn't from some fucking pirates or slavers, it was from herself. Until Bowen wanted to receive help, nobody could save her. Artorias didn't want to let her go. It was the last thing he ever wanted to do on this earth. But he was out of options, out of answers... He thought back to what his mother said, about what he had to do. She had to fall, and she would either swim or she would drown. Artorias screwed his eyes shut and scowled, just barely holding back the anguished snarl while he shook his head. What other choice did he have? "...This is really what you want?" He didn't agree with Resin's suggestion. He didn't agree with letting her go like this. But he had nothing else he could do when he'd exhausted himself trying everything else for her. Being with her, making himself available at all times, finding trips and adventures for them to share, doing all he could to keep her included and cared for... None of it mattered in the end.

With a heavy sigh, fire-blazoned eyes slowly opened again and looked back to Bowen, utterly defeated. His arms loosened around her, letting the two slide apart. Bowen wanted to leave. Resin wanted her to break. There was nothing more for him to do here. "If this is truly what you want, then it shall be. I'll reach out to Sirius, see if he has space to put you up in the Armada for a bit. Whether you stay there or not is up to you." At least then he could say he tried everything, and if Bowen decided to leave the Armada and abandon the Hallows to strike it out on her own, then that decision was all on her.

"Artorias Carpathius" | "Carpathian" | "Corbin" | "Argent"