Little Fiery One

Manea's gaze never left him as he mocked the idea of doing any of this for their daughter's soul, insisting that they in fact didn't have them. A frown creased her features as she watched him with growing frustration and worry, bewildered as he stormed back over to the shelving along the wall of their den and started grabbing vials from the collection of extracts and herbs that they kept on hand. She didn't know the use of most of them and mostly just trusted Irilyth to give them what they needed, but now Alastor was downing them as if they were water , making her flinch slightly as he threw them aside and caused them to shatter and it made an anxious fear creep up her spine. She tried to interrupt him as he began to rant about how both of them were damned for their sins and how their children were the only ones saved of it, questioning him, "Alastor, what did you just take?" But he didn't seem to hear her as he went on, looking at her with an insane look in his eye and a snarl on his lips.

She paid just enough attention to what he was saying to gather the bits about how they had no proof, how they only spoke their words and rituals without evidence. She heard what he was saying, but she wasn't processing it yet. Her mind was still reeling, her gaze flicking worriedly to the shattered shards of glass. "Alastor..." she said in the middle of his speech, unable to stop him to even find out what it was he had taken. He growled and started to pace again and she saw him reach for another vial. "Alastor!" she said louder, more insistently, but he tossed this one back just as quickly before she could stop him and a dread and fear of the unknown substance ate at her, making the anger and exhaustion she felt pale in comparison to her fear over the well being and life of her husband. He insisted that she look at him, but she already was. Her eyes never left him, watching him with concern as he turned his tormented gaze toward her. He wore the manic smile that she had become familiar with across his expression, but the pain in his eyes tore at her as if he had sunk his claws into her chest. He spoke of being a monster, of how he was too far gone to be saved, and she was so incredibly frustrated with him that he couldn't see himself the way she saw him.

As he began to slump down from what ever it was he took, the anxiety he caused finally pushed her to her feet. The moment she managed to stand she staggered for a moment, the world spinning until she was able to regain her balance and take a few deep breaths. Having not slept properly for the couple of days leading up to her birth, the intense labor she endured, the draining and tormenting day she had just gone through, and the fact that she still hadn't properly slept or ate for the entire day nearly made her fall over again, but she managed to stay on her feet and at least managed to make sure their daughter was safely tucked into some of the bedding before she took a few heavy, struggling steps over to where he was sitting. She listened as he said how he had nothing to fall back on, how he had watched her kill their children and he was left with nothing as she crossed toward him, gritting her teeth as he said how she should have never taken him as her mate.

She collapsed onto her haunches directly in front of him, her breathing labored as she caught her breath from the small movement that had knocked the wind out of her. They were both in no state to be having these conversations, but it had to be done. They were ripping themselves to shreds and if she had any hope of holding onto what tattered pieces they had left she had to reel back in the Alastor she knew and loved. "It has never been about the pretty words or the fancy rituals. Those are just a side effect, a formality... Our proof is a lineage of wolves who are strong, equipped to deal with this harsh, unforgiving word. It's not easy, it's not gleeful. I do not want to kill our children. A piece of me died with each of them and I'll never get them back." Her voice strained and broke the more she spoke, her already tired, aching eyes beginning to fill with tears again. "But I do it because I know our tiny girl was the runt of the litter with vibrant coloring who would only ever be able to hunt small game at best because any prey would see her coming from a mile away and she wouldn't have any other tools at her disposal to make up for it. I do it because our boy would have grown as tall and heavily built as you, if not more, and would have to deal with the way a body like that degrades more quickly than others and he wouldn't have any kind of tools to give him an upper hand in fights to make up for his lack of speed or mobility." She knew it was logic and truth that would be hard to hear just as it was hard to say it, but this was how they decided who had the best chance of carrying on their legacy and surviving in a world that was hardly kind on a good day.

"Yes, I have obligations to our family as the Matriarch and I would be lying if I said that have some sort of sway in my choices, but I truly only want our child to have the best chance at survival. That is why we do what we do. Whether or not you believe that our daughter now has a complete Ancient soul from our ancestors and all of the strength of the Ancients at her back is up to you... All that really matters is that you know that she..." she added softly, glancing back at the fire-marked girl waiting for them in the soft bedding, "She is the best of both of us." She looked back to Alastor, desperately hoping that she was finding even a single thing that he could hold onto for solace the way it did for her. Manea glanced down at the pieces of glass that were scattered on the floor around his paws and she reached out, lifting his paw to look at the glass that was embedded in his paw pads. "What did you take?" she asked, with concern, her gaze coming back to his face with a flick of her ears as she prepared to call for Irilyth the very moment he told her if it had been something dangerous. They would need Irilyth anyway for his wounds and the blood loss he was no doubt beginning to feel the effects of, but what he had just drank three vials of was much more concerning to her in that moment.

"Manea Mendacium"