The Last Time

Kotori had been working at getting over himself.  It was childish to cling to something emotionally if it wouldn’t do him any good if it was a thing he just couldn’t have.  Now here she was in front of him again and he felt an ache inside of him that no physical pain could imitate.  It would feel both better and worse if he had embraced her.  A momentary pleasure to ease a pain that would only become worse a moment later.  Self-control felt horrible but it was for the best.  

He nodded as she spoke of where the instruments had come from and he assumed family gifts would have all the more sentimental value as she left her pack.  Kotori remained silent, listening to her play, the strings bringing forth a sound that fit the tone of the moment.  There was something to the music that seemed to flow in him and entwine with his own emotional state.  

If the strings weren’t enough then when she added her voice into it he felt his soul strings being pulled on.  It was true Kotori had no idea what the song was about but it didn’t matter.  Words could be klunky things at times but this music between her voice and strings and his own current emotions filled him and became linked to his soul’s pain.  It was unlikely he’d forget this moment or her song.  Kotori might have joined in the music except he neither knew this song to keep pace with it as well as Iki did nor was his voice as well trained as hers to mold.  It would be a shame to mess it up.

However, the music was too much to hold back some emotions.  Kotori stood up and quietly moved to sit beside her, not quite touching but about as close as you could get without doing so.  Somehow, even not touching, he could feel her presence right there.  He’d listen till the music stopped, “that was beautiful.  It sounded so sad.  I wish I’d heard you sing that before.”  So this was one of her talents she had learned instead of hunting and fighting.  How much time would it take one to learn such as this?  “When I have children someday if one wanted to learn and our packs would be on good terms, would you let my child visit to learn from you?”  Should have been their child.  

Kotori had never thought of music to have any special appreciation for it.  He didn’t know if it was just because of Ikigai or if he just genuinely liked it.  “I’m afraid I don’t expect I’d have any talent to teach it.  I’d probably sound horrible trying,” said with a small smile, a bit of trying for a lighter tone away from the sadness felt.

"Kotori Fatalis"