Old Habits Die Hard

As was her routine and habit, as soon as the weather began to warm and the seasons began to shift, she began to prepare the herbs she would need for her contraceptives as she went into her heat season again. It was something she did without really thinking after living the life she had lived. Most of her herbs she tended to have on had regardless so it was just a matter of creating the extracts that she preferred to take them as and that's what she was working on now—preparing the leaves to be steeped with a bowl and cloth to strain it through off to the side.

However, she stopped in the middle of crushing up the leaves so they would release more of what she needed from them, staring down at the mortar and pestle in her dexterous paws. It suddenly dawned on her that she no longer needed these. She no longer needed the contraceptives or to prevent herself from getting pregnant. Slowly she put the tools down and she just looked at them for a few moments. Everything in her life and what she had known had been turned upside down in the last few months and now it seemed even this habitual routine and preparation would be disrupted as well. That was going to be a common theme for a while until she got used to this new way of life.

After a bit she finally decided to go ahead and move forward with what she was doing. Even if she wasn't going to take it maybe someone else in the pack would make use of it and then at least the leaves she had begun to prep wouldn't go to waste. As she continued on with making her extracts, she started trying to imagine what it was going to be like carrying Merrick's children, being a mother, raising a pup... It was impossible for her to even picture. After she had transferred the herbs to a jar to steep, she looked down at her slender, scarred stomach and couldn't even imagine how it was going to be to see it round with pups. She had never considered herself mother material, but to keep this life with Merrick she would do anything.

"Keelin"