I've swallowed myself but the fever remains

Bellamy

The woman felt like the world was crashing around her again. She didn’t know if she could handle this, the overwhelming emotions that threatened to rise up yet again. She was afraid of herself, of what she saw… She didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t anymore. How much of this was caused by the fallen twins and their helper, and how much was caused by her alone? How did she make these feelings stop? How did she keep herself from being a monster? Was there any hope at all? She felt like such a freak, a beast, a creature who was damned to walk alone. Maybe it was fitting… she had sinned after all.

Her thoughts were broken by a gentle paw on her uninjured shoulder. She blinked open her teary eyes to find Bae-Syl was still there, refusing to run. Refusing to save himself or protect Lucette as she begged him to. Her ears remained fallen, a whimper leaving her lips as he spoke. Calm herself… How? How could she stop all the thoughts, these feelings from crashing over her? She wanted to protest, to tell him it was impossible, yet something in the yearling’s action had started a shift…

…and instead, Bellamy drew in a shaky breath.

Being calm had never been her strong suit. She had always reacted on pure emotion and energy… and maybe that was the problem. She didn’t know how to healthy manage herself. Gavroche had been doing what he could for her, taking the burden of her actions on his shoulders, but it wasn’t his burden to bear. She was the one lashing out, reacting this way… She drew in another breath as Bae-Syl sat beside her. Breathe, a small voice within her whispered.

Breathe. Focus on that.

She eyed him, not piecing together what he was doing until she felt his tongue over the injury. A sharp intake of breath and a “Fuck!” Was her response. It had hurt like a bitch before, but now that it was getting tended to that pain flared wildly from the injury. She never did get used to the feeling of properly being treated. Hell, before Gavroche she was lucky if she even bothered to wash a wound. It was a wonder how the woman had survived without proper care. Perhaps a small act of mercy from the Divinities she believed in.

Bells didn’t look at him as he cleaned, and only once his tongue stopped that repetitive motion did she glance his way. She noticed his sense of calm and didn’t pick up on him spitting the blood out. That was… interesting. She furrowed her brow a little. Gav always did… as did Lucy…

He began to speak and Bellamy remained silent, focusing on his voice rather than the emotions that threatened to rise up once again. Yet, as Bae-Syl spoke, the woman grew rigid. Her gaze narrowed, shock crossing onto her face. “This… demon… sounds like one of the descriptions of one of the Elementals of Majofionism...” She was trying to remain calm, not overreact. She didn’t want to risk doing what Bae-Syl said he had been avoiding as well, which was naming her and giving her power over the youth. Still, there was no question about which Elemental the rainbow-marked youth had just described.

The woman of fire herself, Seethe.

It was no wonder that the man was quiet, speaking as though he was losing a battle. If the Elemental had chosen to harass him specifically, a woman who was essentially a Dreamend and Goddess in one, then he would have no easy fight. She whined loudly, keeping her ears pinned against her skull. She didn’t think they were so different either. “I’ve always been told that a weaker wolf could become a vessel for a Dreamend… Maybe they’re really one and the same…” She glanced down at her paws, a heavy sigh escaping her lips.

“...” She could feel herself trembling again. “She’s threatened Lucy!?” Her voice raised again, a growl bubbling in her throat as she staggered to her paws. She couldn’t see that one, Seethe, like Bae-Syl could, but she was damn sure the woman would hear her. She bristled, head spinning around as if she was trying to locate the woman. Her fur was on end, and though she favored the injured leg, she had a look of thunder on her face as she spoke.

“You listen to me and you listen to me well,” She snarled. “I don’t care if you’re a demon, a dreamend, an Elemental, or a fucking GOD,” Her gaze narrowed. “You lay a paw on my child and I will rip your sorry hide straight out of existence and drag you to the Hellgates!” Her gaze shot to Bae-Syl.

“You are not to let her win, do you UNDERSTAND!?” There was a fire back in her eyes now. The woman didn’t care about herself, but when it came to someone else threatening her family… she could give a fuck if they were mortal or not. “If I hear she uses your body as a vessel to harm my baby, you’ll join her faster than you can blink.” She exhaled.

“...and if you won’t run, then you make the same vow to me.” Her voice, still serious, did not falter. “If I ever become a threat to them, whether it is my action or another’s, you take me out. Got it? If these things were going to be a potential threat, if he really wanted her to go back to her loved ones, she needed some type of reassurance. They weren’t so different… but they would need to keep an eye on one another. Something rekindled in Bellamy.

Hope.

It was a faint ember… but… she wasn’t alone in this.

Bae-Syl was fighting too.

…and maybe they could last the rest of their lives, fighting together, as a family.

"Speech" 'Thought.'

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