when we were better

Hanako

It felt as though it had been a lifetime ago since Hanako had last set paws in this place. And though nothing had outwardly changed...it felt so different, like she was looking at this place through a dark and dreary lens. Sapped out the sense of happiness and adventure she'd once found in this place, all the questions that sprung to her mind were tinted with melancholy. What ifs and why's span around in her head, enough to make her dizzy as she padded her way up the stairs. The shattered glass reflected the stars, their potential so far out of reach as she eyed the branching paths the corridors took. Somewhere down the line, had she made the wrong choice? It often felt that way these days, that it was one bad thing after the other. If only she could turn back time and relive the day she had spent here, when everything was so free and easy, a life worth living with smiles and friendship. What little she had often escaped her, slipped through her grasp and was not eager to return. She remembered having hobbies and interests, a desire to see and do more, to better herself in the ways that suited her best. But it all felt stale, her heart had turned to stone long ago and try as she might she couldn't really figure out what point had been the beginning of the end.

Maybe when Meadow had left?

They had pranced down these halls, bright-eyed and excitable. Now her gaze felt dull, icy and cold and her gait was slow, careful as she took care not to stand on the shattered glass. No one had really appreciated her company in the same way since, they always wanted something and asked for more in return, but never Meadow. As friends, they had just sort of...been, you know? They didn't expect anything nor feel disappointed when nothing came of it.

It felt as though the tide was rising all around her, guilt and regret lapping at her limbs. She glanced down at her paws, half expecting to see the ocean roll in and sweep her away, but it did not and the air was still. The waves far away on the beach, dancing back and forth, never approaching or stepping out of their lane. Maybe she should have followed that line of thought, hadn't reached for what was out of her grasp for good reason. Again it was too late and in the dead of night there was little she could do but wish wish and wish.

The quiet here was starting to be too much, too oppressive and ironically, loud. And so as she ambled her way down the halls she found herself humming, a soft and lilting tune that naturally was supposed to be performed with two wolves, not one. Meadow's voice would have filled the gaps perfectly, matched Hanako's high pitch as she gently wooed, pretending the echoes that bounced off the walls were her friend humming in turn.

More than anything she wanted to know what her friend would have thought of her life as it was. Of her children, her fiancé and how he treated her with such disdain. What advice would she have offered? Or would Hanako never had needed it in the first place? Her humming faltered, her breath hitching as she paused in place. The shadows seemed awfully long in this corridor, encroaching and unwelcome in a place that held such fond memories. What other lands might they have explored if their time hadn't been cut short, if Meadow hadn't had to leave...

She shook her head and tried to chase those thoughts away, focused on humming once more, wishing her friend would somehow round the corner and join her again. And what a reunion would it be, all smiles and gleaming eyes. So much time had passed and they had so much to talk about, did she have a family of her own? Had things gone her way, right and good as she deserved? Hanako would be mad if they had not, might even stomp her paw and glare up a storm. That's how much she felt about it.

"Please join me if you can." She asked the darkness, a little embarrassed she had to sink this low. "Just this once."

But then again she hadn't been pelted by dolls and hadn't thrown up on herself either-yet-so how bad could things get? Worse, probably. She wasn't known for being lucky, even her (not) children couldn't escape the curse that seemed to run through her veins. And maybe that's what she deserved, to be made a mockery of, to be left alone at the end of all things. She sighed softly and titled her head up to watch the ceiling, eyed the cracked gaps that allowed a scant glimpse of the stars.

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