Ever Worry It Might Be Ruined

He didn’t think that his dark black heart could let go of the hate and history that bred and bubbled within his heart. However, after his night with Duchess none of the memories had that deep seated oil any longer. He could stop remembering and reliving them for the first time. Maybe he wasn’t experiencing peace, but he had found a higher state of being. One that didn’t have him living in the past any longer.

One would believe moving past the previous events of his life but Noir felt the opposite. He wouldn’t have ever admitted it, but without holding onto that hate the aging man felt old. Noir spent so long obsessing over what happened and how much he hated his family life felt empty. Like his purpose was gone, but had his dark feelings ever really been a purpose? He had been chasing his own pleasure for so long. Did he even have a real purpose?

With these heavier thoughts of his mind, some of them that should have appeared years and years ago, Noir woke alone in the temporary den. Groggily he pulled himself up, wanted nothing more than to lose himself in Duchess but she wasn’t even there. He was becoming addicted to what she could do for him, when he was in the throes of pleasure nothing else mattered and he could forget about the mess that his life had turned into.

He picked himself up and followed Duch’s trail, finding her sitting quietly by the water of the shrine. He approached slowly, trying to decide if he was upset or not about her not being there when he woke up. ”What are you doing out here?” He rumbled deeply, though he wanted his question to have been ‘why did you leave me?’