The point of no return was a particularly frightening concept. And it seemed that once the door to doubt was opened, it was becoming increasingly difficult to close it once again. It wasn’t that she didn’t want this. It was the anxiety of commitment that fluttered in her chest and the back of her mind. But then again … it wasn’t like they were entering a relationship- nothing was being promised. But then why did she feel so out of place- why had she hoped he had somewhere to be in this specific moment? At the base components, she definitely wanted Balthier’s company. She enjoyed his attention- the desire that she thought she could see in his gaze left her nearly quivering. She also didn’t want to disappoint or upset him, which is why she felt like she was being ripped into two by her head and her heart. More than anything, Kiliaen wanted things to work out for them. She wanted him to be happy, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something seemed wrong. Maybe it was just her, but she wanted to believe that it wasn’t.
It killed her to come to acceptance, but she couldn’t bring herself to seek out his touch again- not now. With a silent exhale of breath, she pulled herself back up into a sitting position, looking at her paws while she gathered her courage. “Balthier …” She started, her voice quiet- distant. “I feel very vulnerable right now …” Kiliaen hesitated, daring a glance in his direction “I-I don’t know what to say.” She admitted guiltily, hoping she wasn’t ruining whatever semblance of a bond that had begun between them.
