There's no place that's home

Mojito had run, he did not know how he'd managed to get out of that with not only his pelt intact but his freedom, for whatever it was worth. So he'd run, he wasn't about to push his luck. He'd find a way to talk to Nao soon but for now he simply needed to get away. His paws had carried him away, he didn't have a place he was going just away, even without thinking he had headed in the general direction the pack he knew his daughter was in, but he wasn't intending to go there specifically and his adrenaline was already failing and he slowed first to a trot then a walk and then finally he fully stopped.

He ached, physically of course, his face was starting to throb but more than that he ached deep in his heart. His mind was finally starting to catch up with it all, starting to put the pieces together and the worst part was he was realizing that the feeling, the pain welling deep within his chest, was familiar. That made it worse. Mojito panted, sky blue eyes scanning the horizon but he knew he was safe for now, but for how long and would he ever feel safe again? It was crashing over him, the realization... The Armada, it was not home, never could be again. The place he'd chosen for himself, the place he'd hoped he could return too, the place where he'd thought he'd carved out space for himself... Had it all been a lie? He'd felt useful there, had made some connections there, and now? Now it was all gone, for the first time since he'd been a child choosing to leave the family that had never been family to him behind, he felt lonely and lost. And he hated how familiar that felt.

It all seeped out of him, he hunched over himself and let out a yell, it was a primal thing, not a scream, closer to a growl. There was frustration there, anger and sadness and oh so much pain. Was this going to be his life forever? Was he never going to actually belong anywhere, always be less than everyone else, always find that what he wanted would never be off consequence? He wasn't even sure he could keep his promise to Nao... Not if he was well and truly alone, and had nothing of worth to anyone... and it seemed never would. Some part of him was trying to rationalize, that hadn't been Sirius but in truth it didn't matter... If Azure had the authority to try and take him into custody then in some way he had his father's endorsement or didn't need it and Mojito could not feel comfortable there ever again. Fuck! It hurt so fucking much!


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