goodbye

Araneae · 07-09-2023, 07:00 AM

a sharp breeze buffets the fur along their spine, drawing a violent shiver from their tiny body. around them, the world is a veritable riot of colour, oranges and reds and yellows splattering the floor like a bloodstain. as Araneae takes another plodding step, a leaf crackles pleasingly underfoot, and a giggle rises, unbidden, to their lips. they are still so young, a child brimming with curiosity and mischief, and they can’t resist stamping down on the leaf in quick succession, shattering it into tiny yellow pieces. a short ways ahead, a second set of footsteps come to an abrupt halt. a sigh rends the air, and they perk up as Mother’s weary amber gaze tracks over them with brisk impatience.

“Spider,” she calls – because Araneae is too much of a mouthful for one so small – “put that leaf down and hurry up. We’ll be late.”

they give a disgruntled huff as they quicken their pace, falling into step beside Mother. the two of them walk together in relative silence for a while, broken only by the distracted snatches of song Araneae bursts into. “Mama,” they say finally, straining their neck to look up, up, up into that lined face, “what will we be late for?”

“what?” Mother snaps, eyes closing in exhaustion. it’s an expression they’re familiar with, that screwed-up brow and those thin, pursed lips. tired, they know it to mean. just tired, love.

“well,” Araneae says, as though it’s obvious, “we can’t be late if no one’s waiting for us. is someone waiting for us, Mama?”

it’s a perfectly logical question to them, but it must be the wrong question, because Mother halts suddenly and looks down at them with a strange, unreadable expression shifting across their face. after a moment, they look about and give a short, brisk nod. “i suppose this is as good a place as any.”

they tilt their head, eyes imploringly curious and innocently trusting. “for what, Mama?”

Mother sighs and twists her neck, emitting a series of sharp clicking sounds. “i need you to stay here, Spider.”

Araneae opens their mouth in protest – but Mother looks so serious that it’s all they can do to shut it and offer a slow, affirming nod. “okay.” Mother gives a wan smile and turns on her heel, but she only gets several steps away before panic sets in. “wait! where are you going?”

Mother returns to their side in a matter of heartbeats, a frown marring her face. “stop that, now.” it’s only then that they realise they’re crying. “i need you to be brave. you can be brave, can’t you?”

they nod again, still hesitant. but Mother is looking at them with great expectation, and they so desperately don’t want to let her down. “o…okay.”

Mother gives a quirk of a smile, and it’s the happiest they’ve seen her in months. “good. i knew you could be.” She presses a chaste kiss to their forehead, and warmth sweeps through them from their head to their toes, engulfing them so immensely they want to cry again. “goodbye, Araneae.”

they watch the spot Mother had been long after she disappears into the distance. they watch the spot until the sun lowers in the sky and their stomach begins to complain. they watch until it’s so cold they can’t even feel their toes.

but she never returns.

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