I want to be little again

With her father's strong embrace scooping her up it was easier to forget the responsibility that sat on her shoulders and just be his little girl again, even for just a moment. She tucked herself into his chest, finally letting the torrent of emotions come rushing past the walls and barricades she had compartmentalized it all into while she clung to him and let herself believe that her dad could make everything right again just like he did when she was little even though there was no fixing this loss or this grief. Still, despite everything, his presence and his comforting was still soothing and grounding in a way that she had desperately needed, feeling safe enough in his arms to let herself have this release.

As he tried to console her with his sympathy and his assurances that this wasn't her fault, she couldn't help the twist of guilt that gnawed at her stomach. She understood what he was trying to do and say and she appreciated his efforts more than she could possibly say, but she knew and believed deep down that this was entirely her fault. She had known the risks, had known the high possibility that something could go wrong, but she had followed her heart to the very end with the irrational hope that she could give Saracyn and herself the life that they had wanted so badly. She had done everything she possibly could to give her twin everything and it had only come back to smack her down for flying too close to the sun.

For a while all she could do was cry until her eyes were tender and her breathing settled into stuttering hiccups for air. Even as her tears began to run dry, she never loosened her grip on her father, clinging to him like a life raft out of fear that if she let go she might go adrift once more. She wasn't sure how long it was before she managed to breathe more easily and she was able to blink open her tender eyes, but once she was able to she rested her head on his now damp chest with a heavy, shaky sigh and was just quiet for a moment until she finally asked in barely a whisper, "Is... Is mom mad? Disappointed?" Knowing that her mother had tried to hard and arranged so much to prevent this very thing from happening, she couldn't bear facing her just yet out of fear of seeing the knowing look of disappointment.

"Avacyn Mendacium"