It's not what they fear most

*Hajime* · (This post was last modified: 09-26-2013, 05:31 PM by Hajime.)

The early morning came too easy fro the male. What was hard was the small trance spell he had been in during the night due to a panic attack that he didn't think he would have. Hajime hadn't asked or yelled out for help, so this morning where he was at was in the middle of one of the valleys of the territory digging holes in the ground. Just to ease his nerves really. There were three small ones dug around him. His red eyes looking down until he decided to walk along the rim of the valley. He hadn't had time to explore the territory since he was accepted. Entirely though he had already heard about the new beta. Newt, a dark woman as she had heard she was. He didn't think she would have time to meet him either. At the moment Hajime had other things on his mind. After last night, he had close to no energy, but he wanted to be hyper and to be doing something productive. The boy could have been helping mark the borders, but he didn't see that as a job he needed to do unless he was to be accepting members. Just as he stopped at the edge of the rocky valley he blinked his eyes and tried to shake the feeling of his panic attack away. The main question was what had made him have it? Well it could have been the nightmare that he had. There were so many questions unanswered in the boys head, it wasn't even funny when he thought about it.
Hajime hadn't really done much in his life, but he could only think about the amount of pain his mother had gone through. It made him want to cry, again, for the hours ahead in the day. Rivaxorus was a lady of strength and power, but she had lost everything before she went to Seracia. That included him and his uncle. Hajime had killed his only brother, and his foster grandfather had killed the wolf who raped Riv along with the newborn child that had come with her. Hajime didn't see why the small pup had to die, but when he witnessed that, it made him feel more and more like a killer every time he thought about Tanner. Tanner wasn't entirely evil, or at least he hadn't thought he was. Until he started to speak about his plans to kill Rivaxorus. Hajime's different colored ears flicked as he raised them. He took in a deep breath on the edge of where he was and held it in before letting it out. He had to calm down, if anyone caught him like this it wouldn't turn out well.
The boy talked to himself slightly as he lowered his head towards his chest trying to calm himself down. Though one it didn't work, he pulled himself onto his stomach. Stretching out his limbs as he set his head down on the dirt. His life wasn't bad, but he didn't like to think of others in pain. Haji was afraid of making mistakes, of tripping up and never seeing faces again. It was at times like these he wished he knew his father. The man had died of disease, leaving Riv to raise him. He had heard the stories of Riv's father trying to kill her. But he just couldn't imagine someone wanted to kill their own child? With his uncle as well, what about his uncle. He had left him in the dust for some sort of sick game? Allen was probably worried sick, and it was his fault. Hajime just had it up to his chest in his thoughts. Maybe it was some sort of disease all on its own.
Hajime spoke softly to himself, as he tried to calm himself. The boy rose to his paws, or at least attempted to. Everything around him was a bit dizzy, it was obvious that he'd be a bit groggy. But he had to stop thinking of such things. Hajime only wished someone was here to comfort him, no matter how he looked at it. He still had those small pup qualities in him. Even if he didn't he would wish for a friend of a lover to hold him close. Hajime closed his red eyes tight and shook his head nearly tripping over his own paws his tail flailing behind him to try and keep his balance. Hajime sucked in his breath to try and keep his balance. His ears cocked back as he hoped for his body to just work with him. He didn't want anyone looking after him if it meant causing them trouble. Hajime didn't ever want to cause anyone trouble.

Speech,

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