this was arguably the hardest thing he had ever done, and to be quite clear it was breaking him more than he ever thought it would. He was standing, strong, meanwhile breaking the heart of that who most loved him. It was difficult, but he had to withstand trial to save her. Of course, he expected her to fight against his words, to struggle, to clammer around and beg and tell him not to. Though; why? It was simple, she was beautifully selfless, a miraculous child that saw no wrong in the world, that would do anything to keep him from pain and just bless him in any way that she could, even if it meant causing herself pain unimaginable. Why...oh why would she torment herself in such extreme ways for him? He had done nothing to deserve that. Nothing.
It came and he could feel his heart tighten, as she yearned to make excuses for the things that had happened: saying things like the pain was worth it, and the joy was something excessively resplendant. Why would she dare say that when he so yearned to help her? "Soleil, you passed out, I feared you were going to die you know? I feared so much, and what kind of man am I if I cause that again? A selfish one, one that doesn't deserve you. I want to deserve you," he wanted to make everything okay, but that wasn't happening as quickly as he wished it was.
His eyes fought back showing the emotion that hid on the brink of his mind. He wouldn't be weak, not today, not when it wasn't an option. A sigh slipped past the confines of his lips and he looked at her with the most meaning he could, the most meaning he could without bursting into tears. "Soleil, I don't want more sons, I want you healthy, I want you alive. I want to make sure that you're around to see the sons we do have grow up," that was all he cared about, making sure she saw the successes of Gael. And that her daughters grew up to be beautiful young women. They had so much to look forward to in life.
