We All Miss Someone
12-30-2013, 05:50 AM
A female voice reaching her ears caused the dark woman to jump. She lifted her head, opened her eyes, and turned her head to see Loccain at her side. She had been so caught in her grief that she hadn't heard the Queen approach. Destruction moved to a sitting position, eyes trailing to the flowers once Loccain spoke again. Destruction would close her eyes again, finding the will to speak. To share her burdens with another. Something she still found very hard to do. "I was wondering who had placed them there. Thank you... for not leaving him out." The woman opened her crimson ringed eyes, staring down at the mound of earth. "I hope that you do not mind, Loccain... but I'm going to talk for a while. I'm going to share things with you that very few wolves know. It is time for someone to know." Destruction knew she had to open up to someone. Her past, her worries, her sadness would surely crush her if she didn't. Loccain was her Queen now... so if anyone should be able to understand and help her... it was the very wolf that sat next to her. "I will start with how it was I was given the name Forbidden Destruction. It was not the name my parents gave me... that name... their names... their faces... are long lost." The she wolf would pause, taking a breath before she would continue. "From what I can remember life was simple... we didn't have a pack... no one to protect us. I was their only pup. But one day our family was torn apart." Here Destruction would pause, her memory bringing up the pain of that day. Being beaten... no... tortured. "A group of wolves... assassins they were... fell upon me and my parents. My parents were killed without even the slightest mercy... and they took me. I tried to resist them in the beginning... but a pup can only take so much before their spirit is broken, shattered, and a newer, darker way of thinking is thrust upon them. I was made to join their ranks. To learn to fight. To kill without mercy. I do not remember the day my name was given... they all blur into one blood red mess in my mind. So many innocents were killed... males... females... pups... it didn't matter. Back then... I learned to love such things." But now as Destruction spoke of them she visibly shuddered, her own mind horrified that she had once thought and acted in such a manner. "I lived like that for some time... until the leaders of the assassins died. We turned on each other, no longer having a leader to unite us... to no longer hold our loyalty. We held none towards each other... only him." Destruction allowed her eyes to open again. "I stumbled across Alacritia... Seracia... and decided to pledge my loyalty to Maverick. But a pack runs differently then a group of killers. I distanced myself from the pack... lost in a new type of world I didn't understand. I eventually met Bane too... and truth be told... our encounter left me wanting to tear his throat out." Which wasn't at all the case now. "Well... we mated... I was originally going to cause a miscarriage... but... something inside me didn't want that. So I carried out the pregnancy. I gave birth to a single pup. A male. Dillinger." The wolfess set her paw back on the grave. "I was hardly the motherly type... in fact... before his birth I hated pups. But I suppose all females have some sort of motherly instinct. He started to grow... and I saw potential in him. To be what I was. But things took a turn for the worse." Destruction closed her eyes again, heaving a huge sigh. "Dillinger got sick. I didn't know what the aliment was... or how to treat it... and as far as asking for help from the pack... I simply didn't know how. It was so foreign to me... and I kept Dillinger and myself so distanced from everyone else that no one even knew of his birth. Not even Bane." Destruction opened her eyes, a deep look of sadness within them as her memories shifted from her suffering to the suffering of her only child. "Day by day I watched Dillinger grow weak. He stopped playing... barely ate... and slept almost constantly. I was lost... and I did nothing except watch my own son die. I was stricken by a new sensation... grief. The day his spirit departed was the first and last day that Bane saw his son. Dillinger had never even known his father's name." Destruction let out another sigh. "It wasn't until Dillinger died that I realized that I needed to change... though change is not something that comes about easily. I took the first step in my attitude towards Bane. Dillinger was our blood bond... even if he was gone. I made an oath to Bane that day... that even though we were not mates, should he ever have children and be apart from them, that I would watch over them as a god mother. The words... the promise... they were all strange... but... they felt good to make. Since then I've been trying to make myself more social and open within the pack. There were still times I was filled with rage and the desire to hurt... but over these past few months that has faded. I found myself able to slowly start edging myself into pack ways. I offered to take an apprentice, to find something useful to offer the pack, but the child went missing before his training could begin." Destruction paused for a moment before continuing. "Most of my time since then is much as is it now. I patrol Seracia and watch things from the shadow, edging towards others when I'm feeling a bit bold. Befriending Tahlia has been a large step for me... and I believe I've made a friend in Dragon and Maverick's young daughter Celeste as well." Destruction looked to Loccain. "I know my behavior towards the pack is not yet satisfactory, Loccain... but I promise you I am trying my hardest to fit into our life here." It would be a lot to take in at once... but Destruction needed reassurance. Needed to know that things would be okay. That it was understood she wasn't trying to cause trouble. "Speech" Think |
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