my kingdom come [DM]
12-30-2013, 11:43 PM
MORPHINE vs. SERAPHIM for DEATH Round 1
Morphine: 10 for clarity. none 8 for powerplaying. ?If/When the wraith was within striking distance of her opponent? Avoid conditionals, or assuming she got within range. (-3) 10 for defenses. head lowered, eyes narrowed, ears pinned back, jaws parted, lips tucked, chin tucked, hackles raised, shoulders rolled, scrunched neck, limbs equally spread, legs bent, toes spread, toes biting into ground, tail, weight evenly distributed. 3 for attack. +4 Attempting to slam shoulder into chest (additional point given for maim attempt/use of momentum), -1 because this would probably slam his shoulder with equal force into Morphine?s own chest. +0 for bite to neck (She is 10 inches shorter than Seraphim. It is not logical to me that she?d be able to reach this part of his neck without rearing up), +0 for attempted trip up (if she was biting the other side of his neck, she wouldn?t be able to see her paw, so it?s not really realistic for it to be effective considering. Also not sure this movement is entirely realistic for a wolf) 10 for injuries.First round Round One Moprhine Total: 41/50 Seraphim: 0 for clarity. ?His shoulder would drop as he returned the charge? which shoulder? (-2) ?Seraphim would try to lessen the damage to his own shoulder by throwing his weight against hers? What is he trying to hit Morphine with? (-3)?and therefore would try to force her teeth to clamp around some portion of his maw? (-3) What part of his jaw? ?If he was successful in altering? It?s your job to say her jaws clamped around his maw. When you move your character and thus change where attacks may land, it?s your duty to say and explain where your opponent?s attacks hit. (-5) What damage did he get from them colliding? (-2) What side is he twisting his head to? (-2) 0 for powerplaying. ?If he was successful in altering? Don?t use conditionals (-3) ?He would hope that his change of position would line her outstretched jaws up with his face rather than his neck? Morphine is 10 inches shorter. If anything her jaws would be at his throat (-3) ?A grip on her muzzle, if he was successful in getting it, would aid him in his takedown attempt.? Conditional (-3) ? Upon hitting the ground, with or without Morphine, he would try to use the momentum from the fall to help him roll over his left side and get back to his feet quickly. ? Way too much movement in one post (-5). 10 for defenses. legs spread, body lowered, legs bent, weight centered, claws in ground, tail, ears, eyes, lips, shoulders rolled, hackles raised, head lowered, jaws parted. Rebalancing weight upon hind legs before lifting off. 4 for attack. +0 for attempt to bite Morphine?s muzzle (full points not awarded due to vagueness, and the fact that it?s hard to understand how twisting his head to the side would get him a bite on Morphine) +3 for attempting to pull Morphine to the ground with him (full points given due to size difference, which would make this attack incredibly effective, especially since Morphine?s opposite leg is lifted) +1 for effectiveness grip on muzzle would have on dragging down Morphine 10 for injuries. First round. Bruising to chest/shoulder, bite to jaw Round One Seraphim Total: 24/50 Round 2
Morphine: 7 for clarity. ?only her front half would lower to the earth as he hit the ground, neck muscles tensing and back attempting to slope to her right and away from his forelimb in an attempted effort to resist his weight? This doesn?t really make sense. It?s hard to understand what you?re trying to say here (-3) 0 for powerplaying. ?the male would fail to offset her balance completely? you need to explain why this failed, especially considering the large size difference between Seraphim and Morphine (-3) ?hoping to position herself straight out from the top portion of his ribcage? This is a lot of movement to make in the time that Seraphim is falling (-5). Honestly, considering the grip he has on her muzzle and the size difference, I am really uncertain how Morphine did not fall, even with her movements (-5). 10 for defenses. weight distributed amongst three grounded limbs, head lowered, chin tucked, jaws parted, tail, legs spread equally, legs bent, toes spread, claws gripping soil, eyes narrowed, ears pinned back, hackles raised, shoulders rolled, neck scrunched 5 for attack. +4 for attempting to bite Seraphim?s jaw (extra point granted for maim attempt) -3 for potential for this attack to further harm Morphine by driving his lower teeth up through the roof of her mouth. +4 for attempting to stamp on Seraphim?s throat (extra point for vital area) 4 for injuries. deep bruising to left shoulder (-2) Bite/grip to muzzle/mouth (-4) Round Two Morphine Total: 26/50 Seraphim: 6 for clarity. How much damage was done to his neck? (-2) ?Seraphim would swing his hips around? Which direction? (-2) 0 for powerplaying. ?In immediate reaction, he would tighten his grip upon her nose? Even though it seems logical that he?d be able to do this, you still need an ?attempt?, because it affects Morphine. (-5). How does he release Morphine when she?s gripping his jaw back? (-5) It doesn?t seem logical to me that he would be able to avoid Morphine?s paw with his roll (-3) ?as he leapt deftly to his paws just a few feet away from the witch and swung his hips to meet her head on again.? Way too much movement for one post. (-5) ?A moderate bruise would bloom on his own skull from the impact if it occurred, but he would ignore it.? Don?t write this injury yet. It should be in the next round, otherwise you?re assuming it hit (I?m deducting this in the next round if it occurs) (-3) ?Immediately upon reaching her? Don?t assume he was able to reach her (-2) ?If he succeeded, he would drop the entirety of his weight onto his front paws? Conditional (-3) 10 for defenses. tail tucked, legs spread, body lowered, knees bent, claws biting ground, weight on toes, hackles raised, shoulders rolled, head lowered, chin tucked, eyes narrowed, ears pinned back. 4 for attack. +1 Attempting to bite down harder +1 for paw attack (really wouldn?t be effective enough; it wouldn?t damage Morphine at all and probably wouldn?t stand to delay her attack) +1 for attempting to head butt Morphine (effective attack due to distance, potential to give Seraphim brain damage. Also puts him in an awkward position because of the 10 inch height difference. Extra point for maim attempt) +1 for attempting to knock Morphine down (considering he?d have no momentum behind this and Morphine has a lot of time to balance herself, it?s not likely to work. Additional point for maim attempt) 3 for injuries. Fractured mandible (-5), moderate scrapes to neck (-2) Round Two Seraphim Total: 23/50 Round 3
Morphine: 6 for clarity- ?Although completely baffled by how he had managed to open and close his mouth to escape her grasp when she had a hold of his mandible? Honestly, comments like this should be left out of fights. If there is confusion, PM Raii or ask a judge. It?s not polite to have something like this said in character (-2). ?the wraith would immediately throw her weight forward in an attempt to push into him? Push into him with what? You probably mean her chest, but specification is still needed. (-2) 4 for powerplaying. ?Would immediately throw her weight forward in an attempt to push into him to lessen the damage? This would probably worsen the damage, so it?s confusing why it didn?t do that? (-2) ?Regardless of whether or not she succeeded in impacting his right forepaw, the wench would immediately plant her left forepaw back to the safety of earth as the male swung around to her left.? Too much movement. Allow Seraphim to react to the foot before placing it down (-2). I didn?t deduct for this because Seraphim?s movement almost forced Morphine?s movement, but charging forward and completely turning around after is a bit too much movement. Lack of damage from Seraphim?s claws (they landed and he was moving down, they should have done some sort of damage) (-2) 8 for defenses. head lowered, chin tucked, neck scrunched, shoulders rolled, hackles raising, legs spread equally, legs bent, body lowered, toes spread, claws biting into soil, tail, eyes narrowed, ears pinned back, jaws parted, lips curled. -2 didn?t adjust balance when she lifted her foot. 9 for attack. +1 for attempting to counter head butt (considering the size differences, she might strain his neck, but I don?t think it?s likely she would be able to avoid being pushed back as intended), +3 for attempting to break Seraphim?s toes (one point not given due to the fact that this would probably knock Morphine off balance, bonus point given for maim attempt) +1 for attempt to off balance Seraphim (while it?s likely she would offset his balance by moving forwards, it?s unlikely their chests would collide due to the height difference) +4 for bite to leg (extra point for maim attempt) 5 for injuries. Worsened damage to mouth (-2), slight lacerations to arm pit (-1), Moderate bruising to chest (-1). scrapes to shoulder and neck (deducted by judge, -1) Round Three Morphine Total: 32/50 Seraphim: 4 for clarity- ?As Morphine?s chest would contact his and an aching bruise would blossom, but it would be ignored? How much damage was caused? (-2) Specify how many bones in his ankle (there are quite a few) were broken (-2) ?The position of her face turned to his right side? Considering his broken leg is in her mouth and she was attacking from the inside, his leg and side are more likely to hit the ground first (-2) 6 for powerplaying. ?As he reached her and her left foot rose above his right he would slide the leg in her path back, but too late to be saved completely.? You can?t change your attack after it?s already been launched (-2). ?bones would break as a result of the impact? I realize you put an OOC note after this, but you still need a ?hopefully? in here. I?m not allowed to judge by OOC notes. You?re not allowed to dictate what damage Morphine would get. (-2) 10 for defenses. head lowered, chin tucked, eyes narrowed, ears pinned back, shoulders rolled, hackles raised, legs spread, toes spread, knees bent, tail, weight in hind legs, claws in soil. 5 for attack.+3 bite to neck (full points not awarded due to him not being able to use his jaw?s full force, bonus point for vital area/vulnerability use)+2 for knock over attempt (while more likely than his previous attempts to knock her over, still not as likely considering his more off balance position and her balanced stance. Extra point given for Morphine?s muzzle being turned that way, which would potentially result in her jaw/mouth being damaged upon impact) 1 for injuries. -1 moderate bruising to chest, -1 moderate bruising to head, -3 broken toes, -5 broken right ankle Round Three Seraphim Total: 26/50 Totals:
Morphine: 99/150 Seraphim: 73/150 And the winner is...
Morphine! Final results pending Vivien?s judging. Damage:
Morphine- pending. Seraphim - pending. Notes:
Tips for both writing, and some suggestions. Honestly, with the both of you the issue was too much movement. Fights take place in fractions of seconds; you need to realize what timing would work in those fractions of seconds. Both of you did excellent with defenses, with very few deductions there. Aly, the big thing that got you was with Morphine's positioning, and why certain things did and didn't happen with her. You did very well to include aggressive attacks and maim attempts, which were appropriate considering this was a fight to the death. Raii, I honestly felt like, while your taking of damage was admirable, more counters and avoidance of heavy damage could be used, for if you notice the difference in injuries really accounted for a lot of the score difference in this fight. It also might have been beneficial for Seraphim to have gone for more vital areas on Morphine, and to try to maim her more and make better use of their massive size difference. If you guys have any questions about this, feel free to Skype me or hit me up with private message about what you would like clarification on. - By [MUSE]
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