Roses, Roses, that's all your offering me
02-03-2014, 10:29 PM
Vahva had just finished up the wrapping, moving her leg a little to give a feel for it. This one was deeper than most of the wounds she got from her captors, but she had long since forgotten the pain. Her red eyes would move to the male as he called for her. Gamma, no longer. She had foolishly jumped ahead of herself in her anger. And she had no clue what these wolves had gone through during the war. The woman would rise herself, coming out of her small confines to face him. She was calm, so very calm, as she took in a deep breath and let it out. Never would she feel the warm gazes of her packmates. The looks she had received, had scarred her heart just like they had when she was younger. "Gael, I understand an apology won't even be enough for my behavior." Her tail flicked as she shut her eyes for a moment. Then opened them again, she had to place the right words. "I should have stayed on the island when I heard the call. I was wondering why I felt so uncomfortable around everyone. It was clear my anger had caught up with me, I don't know what happened during the war. All I know is my fear that has kept me from wanting to be ruled over." Vahva blinked, her wrapped up paw digging into the dirt as she painfully pressed it down. She felt soft tears starting to fall from her face. "There's nothing worse then being reminded that your entire childhood was a mistake. And those gazes were pure proof that I am not worthy of being in Valhallan presence. I was my mothers mistake and here I stand, unable to face the fact that I was depressed looking desperately for help, only trying to turn it into an attention leader fest. I'm sorry Gael, I'm sorry for everyone." She growled to herself, lowering her head shamefully as she let the tears fall. After a few minutes of crying, she lifted her head. And looked very seriously to Gael. "I'd like to request, a demotion. I want to be a healer, and give hope that if I get over my depression, if anyone actually cares. That I would then request to be moved back. But, all I want to do it help. I have already shamed my mother, my alphess. I do not want to do that any longer. And I do not want my emotions to get in the way of my duties." She flicked her tail back and forth. "I want to help, my family, that is all." Her head lowered again. And now, she waited for Gael to speak, in response to her slight breakdown. Speech, |