i walk alone

*Raisa* · 05-09-2014, 12:39 PM

It had been a long, long season. Bitterly, foolishly, Raisa had hoped for the best. But her mind had betrayed her, somehow. The queen had had such a good handle on things, or so she thought. Her mind had felt safe at last, fully hers, and no longer subject to the demons that had plagued her since the flight of her homeland. How was it then, that the children that had brought such love from within her depths, that the mate she had grown so fond of, could so easily be washed away in tides of manic depression, of fear and sadness and anger she had not suspected she was still capable of? In the dead of the night, she had begun walking. It was never with a concrete desire to leave, never the urge to flee something she did not think she could control, but merely the urge to go. And she went. For a long season she had wondered, a member among the the living dead, eating and drinking only when she felt she would perish otherwise. She had never been out of a howl's reach, that much of her had remained, but the rest... Well. The Queen's once luscious coat had dulled some, and she had amassed new scars she could not for the life of her remember how she'd obtained. Her ribs protruded proudly from her sides. It had taken her one long season to remember herself, and a chance encounter as well.

Koros had come upon her in a strange fashion, and one she did not quite remember. It seemed as if she had woken up one morning, and he was by her side as if he had never left. It had been days of recuperation, of small meals and fetched water and bitter herbs, before she could tell him of all that had passed since she had claimed the eastern lands as her own. How much they had grown, how much she loved each and every wolf she had brought into the fold... And how much she missed them. Koros was the final weight she had needed to regain her balance, and now she made her way back to whence she had come. The queen had convinced herself she would be turned away at the border, convinced that the land she had fought so hard for had been claimed now by another. Still, she went. Where once she had worried the demons within her might bring harm to her children, she was now overpowered by the urge to protect them. Was it just another manic swing? ...She did not know. But it was certainly worth dying over, and part of her mind was convinced that fate alone awaited her.

A howl rang out as she crossed the border for the first time in several moons. Katja, the spitfire from a faraway land, and she sounded quite upset. Months ago Raisa might have taken up a trot, but she did not have the energy today. Instead she walked, head low and spirits battered, but hardly broken. Koros padded along, loyal as only an old friend can be, to face what awaited them both. When the queen came at last upon her dark knight, she sighed, and softened. "Hello, Katja."

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