ardent

LEAN, MEAN, FIGHTING MACHINE



The Judge

Administrator

age
-
gender
-
gems
11056
size
-
build
-
posts
2,069
player
06-18-2014, 10:08 PM

Jinxx v Odette for Practice



Round 1
Jinnx:

9 for clarity-Pretty clear, -1 which way did his paws shift him?

5 for powerplaying. -2 careful not to assume he closed the distance, even if there are still two feet to go. -3 give your opponent time to respond, she may well move before you have a chance to attack her thigh, especially if your character has to adjust from a lower attack to a higher attack

7 for defenses.
+1 for each seen

5 for attack. +2 attack for middle of left foreleg +2 shoulder jab. +1 thigh(full marks not given do to powerplay)

10 for injuries.First round

Round one Jinxx Total: 36/50



Odette:

7 for clarity- -1 the sidestepping was a bit confusing -2 "hopefully avoiding bite to her leg" in previous posts it sounded like you dodged. It is up to you to decide the damage from an opponents attack.

4 for powerplaying. -1 don't assume her weight is an advantage. Next time say something along the lines of "she intended to use her weight to her advantage" not that she was for sure going to. -2 watch wording "once her mouth would make contact" you don't know that it will, you need an attempt there as well. -2 I don't find it believable that Odette avoided all damage from Jinxx's attack with her sidestepping technique and that she was only knocked back an inch, especially because of what that would do to her balance (see defenses note)
-1 careful not to assume any amount of distance


2 for defenses. +1 for each seen -3 you need to account for the shift in her weight when she lifted her paw to sidestep, this is especially important as she's being pushed at the same time. Also crossing her legs would further add to her instability.

2 for attack. +2 for attack to scruff (full points not given do to powerplay)

10 for injuries. First Round

Round one Odette Total: 25/50

Round 2

Jinxx:

5 for clarity- -3 It's unlikely he could twist around to bit at her jaw when she has a hold of his scruff. That's a heck of a twist for a wolf to make. -1 "would use his smaller size to advantage" How? This is also close to a powerplay. Watch the word "would" you don't know whether what he does will be successful or not -1 towards the end you say she's exposed, what's exposed?

5 for powerplaying. -1 make sure you "attempt" to face her. She could resist. -4 watch for "if" attacks. give your opponent time to respond. This is also a wide range of motion from snapping up at her head to down at her chest. She could move easily within that time.

9 for defenses. +1 for each seen

4 for attack. +2 for sweeping paw attempt +0 for feint +2 for bit for chest

6 for injuries. -4 scruff hold, inch and a half is pretty deep xD

Round two Jinxx Total: 29/50


Odette:

5 for clarity- -3 clarity, her avoiding his feign as well as the paw business was confusing. She's holding his paw then both are on the ground? he went for her right but somehow got her left and she got a hold of him?
-2 clarity more specif to target, where on the ribcage? low? high? near his forelegs?

8 for powerplaying. -2 considering she cant see his paw, it's a little odd that she managed to catch his paw enough to pull him

4 for defenses. +1 for each seen

2 for attack. Shoulder to ribcage

8 for injuries. Some damage probably should've been taken at some point. It's rare a wolf will get through a spar with just a bruise.

Round two Odette Total: 27/50


Totals:


Jinxx: 65/100

Odette:52/100



And the winner is...


Jinxx! Odette must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out.

Damage:


Jinxxmoderate wounds will take 2 ooc weeks to heal. Bruises a few ic days


Odette Bruises will take a few ic days to heal


Notes:



Tips for both writing, and some suggestions. (no points are deducted here)
Notes

For Jinxx
Careful of assuming distance, regardless of the increment. Always use an attempt as you'll never be able to know just how much distance your wolf will close. Also don't be to hard on your self. That injury to the scruff was pretty deep and I don't think that it needed to be that severe. I appreciate your willingness to take damage though. Also watch the amount of movement you make with your character and give your opponent time to respond to each attack.

For Odette
Try to work in more detail from your summaries into the actual post. As summaries aren't required I can only judge what is in the actual post. Watch your powerplaying, especially when it comes to taking damage. You need to make sure you have very clear and realistic reasons for why your wolf succeeds in a complete dodge.

Thanks guys! <3

EDIT: And sorry for any spelling errors! 0_o holee crap luns...

- By [Lunarcat7]