COLD! But I'm Still Here!

Ooc:// I apologize for the saturation of emotion here, Seren, but I really need to vent some frustration and Newol is my instrument right now.

The brute was pulled from his fury by a somewhat familiar voice. It was never one that he'd spoken to directly before, but still one he knew. It was a voice he'd heard before. A voice that dulled out orders early in the morning, and handed out complements at the end of the day coming back in. It was a hunter's memory. A pack hunter's memory of his Beta. That along was proof enough of his point. He belonged here. Not out in the wilderness with as a Rogue. Yes, it was true that he loved the ability to see others as equals and know them for who they where inside and not just as the title they carried, but now after this, it was fair to say that they would all see each other that way if they survived. No, When they survived!

With a shake, he turned to see the source of that voice, and at once, scared face met scared face. When this happened, something clicked inside of Newol. This was Chrysanthe. He knew her to be an authority figure. Someone his mother had told him lead the pack once before she did. The scars that ran over her eye stood as proof of how much she cared. And then there was Newol. The Desert Brat. The Adopted child. The scars he bore on his face where proof of his own stubbornness when he set heart to something. It was so small a thing, but it was something he'd never had before with this wolf, in fact she probably hardly knew who he was. But here, here, they where themselves.

They where who they truly where for one another to see. And the smart thing to do would have been for Newol to question her as to what she wanted. To let her go first. But he was young, and emotions where tossing about inside him in a raging storm, emotions that he didn't all fully understand growing up the way he had. He needed to yell, he needed to thrash about and get it out of his system, and hopefully as a wolf who had been an Alpha once, she would understand that as the calm of surprise left his face and his lips came back again into a snarl once more, with the fire again beginning to billow from his eyes. The muscles in his neck and shoulders flexed as it all just came unblocked and began to flow. First there was anger. "I want my Home! I met her! I liked her, damnit! And she came and torn my mother's crown away! I want her to know that there at least one wolf left who will never give up on what he believes is Right!" It felt good. To feel the defiance that was his birthright shining through him. That bellow Zaraidd cry of 'Never Say Die' surge from him. But next, next it was just pain, and that pain shown through his eyes as he continued. "I want the Devil to Go! I want it to go away and just let everyone come up for air for a change! I'm sick of everything having to sound like just one big fight to survive!" His words came from his heart. He knew it was the way of the world, but again, he was still young. Not just quite a man yet so to speak. And so to say it out loud, it was something good for his soul.

But finally, what came next... What came next was clear as day as all the anger and fury died down form him. He ears fell as he lowered himself to his rump. That once so firy and determined face fell to his front paws. What was seen here was clear. It was a the panic and desperation of someone's son who thought they had screwed up. Newol believed he'd made a mistake in taking some leave to return to the wild. "I just want my mom... I don't wanna loose another one." He wanted to bring his head back up. He wanted to face her, to show her he was certain of himself and could somehow reclaim or reforge what had been lost, but he couldn't. His eyes closed and his nose stayed aimed at the ground. It was all he could do to keep from tears.