I could show you what you wanna see.
07-13-2014, 05:57 PM
Raw v Impra for Dominance Round 1
Raw: 5 for clarity--2 where on the right side of her neck his he trying to grasp? -2how will latching on there cause her to loose air? -1 you still need to specify that it's her right 'front' paw he's aiming to hook 6 for powerplaying.-2 need attempt phrase for the shoulder slam -2 for "while she was distracted with his frontal attack" you can't assume she was. 10 for defenses. +1 for each seen 6 for attack.+2 for shoulder slam (-1 for pp) +2 for jaw attack (-1 for clarity) +2 for paw attack 10 for injuries.First round Round one Total: 37 Impra: 0 for clarity--3 she swung which way? how? -2 what angle is she approaching his rump at? -2 where on his rump is she aiming? -2 what damage did she receive from him biting her scruff? -2 what part of her is she trying to lean into Raw? -2 what part of Raw is she aiming to lean into? -2 what is she hoping to achieve by kicking at his paw? 3 for powerplaying. -2 "when she would move out of his reach" you need an attempt phrase here -2 you need an attempt when you kick at Raw's paw -1 "and her head would shake violently" you're assuming the attack landed, you need to attempt this. -2 you need to attempt to lean against him 7 for defenses.+1 for each found, -2 for not adjusting her balance upon attack 4 for attack.+1 attack to rump (-2 for clarity issues), +2 kick at paw (-1 for pp). +1 leaning against Raw (I'm not sure I believe this attack to be effective if she's simply leaning into him rather than shoving or doing something to increase her momentum. 10 for injuries. first round Round one Total: 24 Round 2
Raw: 2 for clarity--2 how is he in relation to her when he forms a T? -2 which shoulder does he feel the pressure on? -2 what is he pushing against her? -2 where on her body is he intending to push? 6 for powerplaying.-2 you need an attempt to move into a T position. -2 you need to address Impra's kick to Raw's paw. 8 for defenses. +1 for each seen 5 for attack. +3 for jaw attack, +2 trying to topple her (-1 for clarity) 8 for injuries.-2 bite to the butt Round two Total: 29 Impra: 0 for clarity- -2 which way is she swinging? -2 I wouldn't consider the brachiocephalicus near the shoulder. Be more descriptive of the injury, is it deep? how long? moderate? slight? -2 how did she move so that Raw's jaws ended up on her neck vs her back? -2 where on her neck did the attack land? -2 which side of her neck was hit? -2 which side of his neck is she attack -2 where on his neck does she hope to bite? -1 how intense is the bruising to her sternum? 8 for powerplaying. -2 you need to attempt to line up with him 8 for defenses. 3 for attack.+1 bite to neck (-2 for multiple clarity issues) +2 chest bump 6 for injuries.-3 wound to neck -1 bruising to sternum Round two Total: 25 Totals:
Raw: 66/100 Impra: 49/100 And the winner is...
Raw! Impra must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out. Damage:
Bruising and minor lacerations will take a few ooc days to heal. Moderate wounds and deeper bites will take an ooc week to heal or depending on severity.. Notes:
For Sasuke You're improving! Just work a bit more on your clarity. For StarryClarity is a huge problem for you in this fight. It might help to stick to one attack for awhile until you get the hang of it. Really focus on saying exactly what your character intends to do and where on another character they are aiming for. - By [Lunarcat7]
|
Current time: 11-22-2024, 12:36 PM
Powered By MyBB, © 2002-2024 MyBB Group.
