ardent

blood will consume me



The Judge

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07-24-2014, 09:24 PM
Ack! Sorry for the wait! Lunar is still ailing. ><


Jet v Catrix for Spar



Round 1
Jet:

0 for clarity- -2 what angle is he attacking her at? -2 where on the rump is he aiming? -2 what does he hope to achieve with this attack? Is it for a hold? To cause lacerations?-2 where on her right hind leg his he hoping to hook his paw? -2 be specific in your attacks avoid using "or" then listing potential targets. -2 what is he hoping to grasp her neck with his fangs? forelimbs?

7 for powerplaying. -3 for conditionals, give your opponent time to respond to the first attack before adding in another, this almost inevitably makes for a messy fight right from the start.

7 for defenses. +1 for each -3 for not readjusting balance when lifting paw. Balance is key in a fight.

5 for attack. +1 for jaw attack (-2 for clarity) +2 for paw attack (-1 for clarity) +1 attack to scruff (points lost for pp and clarity) +1 pushing weight down (points lost for pp conditional)

10 for injuries. First Round

Round one Total: 29


Catrix:

3 for clarity- -2 where on her rear did he latch onto her? -1 he's aiming for the right hind leg not the left. Minor directional goof but still an important one. -2 what angle is she approaching him at? -2 what is she hoping to accomplish with the shoulder attack? dislocate the shoulder? just cause bruising? knock off balance?

3 for powerplaying.-3 you need to give your opponent time to respond. If she's facing him it means you assumed her movement succeeded and he let go. -2 don't assume she's a short distance away -2 for conditional "if successful she would do such or etc."

10 for defenses.+1 for each seen

5 for attack.+2 for shoulder attack(-1 clarity issue) +3 jaw attack

10 for injuries.First Round


Round one Total: 31

Round 2

Jet:

0 for clarity- -2 which way does he turn himself, sorry you have to say in your post. -2 how did the attack end up hitting his upper right chest instead of the intended target? -2 where on her face is he aiming to bite? -2 how is he positioning his jaws? for example where the lower jaw hoping to land? cheek? eye socket? -2 what's he pushing against her with? Chest? forelimbs?.

8 for powerplaying.-2 you still need to attempt to face her head on

10 for defenses.+1 for each seen

3 for attack. +1 for bite (-2 for several clarity issues) +2 for attempting to throw her off balance (-1 for clarity issue)
6 for injuries. -1 for minor gash to cheek -3 for severe bruising to chest

Round two Total: 27


Catrix:

2 for clarity--2 where is she aiming with her first bit attacks? -2 you need to specify what part of her body she's aiming to collide with him, even if she plans to put the weight of her whole body behind it you need to state a contact point. -2 you also need to specify a contact point on him, what's she hoping to throw her body into? -2 where on the chest is she aiming to hit. Expanded lungs are large you need to be more specific than that

7 for powerplaying.-3 "snapping and biting weakly at the mans face" give your opponent time to respond to the first set of attacks before making another.

9 for defenses.

4 for attack.+0 for mini bites (points not give for clarity and powerplay issues) +2 body slam (-1 clarity issue) +2 for shoulder slam (-1 for clarity))

7 for injuries.-3 severe wounds to muzzle, will likely scar

Round two Total: 30


Totals:


Jet: 56/100

Catrix: 61/100



And the winner is...


Catrix! Jet must give up by either submitting, fleeing, or passing out.

Damage:


Jet- Severe bruising to chest will take several ooc days to heal, might constrict movement. Gash on left cheek will also take several days to heal, may leave a scar.


Catrix - deep lacerations to rump will take an ooc week to heal and may affect her movement. Will likely scar. moderate-severe wounds to muzzle will likely scar. I imagine the flesh tore further in her attack heightening the severity of the wounds.


Notes:


For Drake Ah clarity, it's such a pain in the butt! But that's the area you need to practice in. Be as concise as you can. Not really much else to say at this point. Watch conditionals as well. The word "IF" almost always hails a conditional so a good rule of thumb is to avoid it.


For SalmonYou're improving! You still need to watch the clarity and the conditionals. I'll repeat this for you as well, the word "IF" almost always hails a conditional so a good rule of thumb is to avoid it. If, then, etc. Keep your attacks and posts concise and don't fret as much about getting in a ton of attacks. It's no good if you loose all those points do to clarity and pp issues.

- By [Lunarcat7]