Until We Meet Again

Walk | Talk | Think

Her body moved presumably of its own volition, carrying her as it tended to away from her den and her newest son toward the mimosa tree that grew above the fjord. It always managed to draw her toward it when things grew quiet and the numbness settled in, the spirit of her husband and the last location that they had shared the same space. A piece of herself had been lost that day too, and as if trying to find it and collect it Tahlia continued to seek out the place over and over again. Even when she had no energy to help herself, to watch her son grow, she still managed to find the energy to travel there. 

But this time felt different. Her legs, once lean and strong and quick, were weak and sluggish, her paws dragging over and through the snow and leaving behind a messy trench from her passing. A figure that had at one point been full and curvy was thin and frail, her appetite gone for so long that her stomach no longer complained to her about being empty. It was like somehow all of her had come to realize what was happening and accepted it, no longer fighting and trying to force her will to do something it no longer felt compelled to do. All except make the trek to her husband's tree. 

It was not a short journey but whether by sheer force of will or a strong habit that could not be deviated from for anything the black and russet wolf arrived. Pale, wintry clouds still covered the sky and blocked the sun from view, but day was still upon her, still so much time before night would fall. But a beautiful sunset was far from her mind and far from her reality. She paused once as she reached the tree and, as if momentarily coming out of her haze, let her golden, seeing and unseeing eyes travel from its tallest branches and toward its trunk, resting upon the nearly indiscernible bump in the snow that spoke of where her husband's vacated body had been buried. 

With the haze descending once again, Tahlia moved. Like she had done many times before, she walked with her new sluggish gait to the base of the tree, the spot as she recalled where her husband had spent the last moments of his life. With stumbling movements, she lowered herself down beside its trunk, her bony shoulder pressing against its bark and her necked stretched so that her chin rested on the snow. Both cloudy and clear eyes closed with a sigh as her body relaxed there in its customary place, feeling a strange moment of peace. He was not here but it was almost like she could feel him still lingering. It was where she reconnected with his memory easiest, and this time it felt stronger than ever. 

As often was the case, she felt no inclination to move, no desire to even cry or speak aloud to Bane's memory. She was only quiet in her reverie, slowly becoming lost in thoughts of days past, memories of when her family had been together and whole. It felt like such a long time ago, so far back that the images became more blurred with each recollection. But she wished more than anything for her husband, to see him, smell him, feel him beside her, to listen to his voice as he spoke her name. I miss you. I need you. The weakness of her failing body coupled with her worsening depression often resulted in bouts of unnecessary sleep, but this was no normal sleep that calmly, silently, settled its soothing touch over her weary body. In sleep she could alter her reality. In sleep there could be no sadness if she wished. In sleep she could revisit her husband. 

There was no fear as she slipped into her final slumber, no sense that her time had reached its end prematurely. She did not know that her body had been slowly shutting itself down or that it could finally function no longer, no consciousness of it as, after she drifted off, it did end up falling absolutely still there beside the tree, lifeless and empty. All she knew was that sleep called, and in her dreams everything was right with the world. 

-Exit Tahlia to Somnium-