With Eyes Wide Open

Another day! Oh boy, the Spring was the best time ever! The sun was out, grass was green, and all the snow was gone. And what happened when snow left? MUD! Oh yes, mud! Letting out a big bark and he ran from the den and right into the open. Golden eyes cast around to try and pick out the best, biggest puddle, but it seemed that there was none around the den. Oh poo... that meant that he had to go looking for them. Trotting around, he jumped and leaped and let out joyful calls. And then the urge to run took over, and Lebrah took off. A war cry of pure joy left his lips and he weaved his way through the trees. Thinking that he heard Anias behind him, he turned his head to see if she was there. Nope! And then he whipped his head around, only to see at the last moment that there was a tree right in front of him. Oh shi-

Crack!

The wolf's head connected with the trunk of the tree, darkness over taking everything else. The pale beast fell to the earth with a solid thud, body limp as it laid to utterly still. It was as if breath was no longer leaving the creature, but slowly his chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm. The rest of him was quite limp, as if nothing had happened moments before. All the joy, everything was gone. Just darkness, silence, and almost lifeless.

Golden eyes opened slowly, confusion dancing upon them. Where in the world was he? He couldn't recall this place at all? Groaning, he slowly pulled himself to his blue paw pads as his nostrils flared. He could pick up his own scent, so slowly the man followed it. His movements were still slow, pain throbbing in his skull. And then he froze, everything coming back to him in a rush. His sisters death, his jaws closing around her throat until the life left her eyes. His brothers, killed before his very eyes. Their screams filled his head, memories of them being torn into tiny parts. Blood everywhere, staining the earth. Cries, tears, blood. Snapping back, Lebrah felt tears fall down his face. No. He remembered everything, every little bit of it. Faye, his dear, dear sister. He had taken the very life from her, he was the reason why she was no longer around. Israel and Colt, his brothers. Oh gods no... The feathered marked man fell to the earth as the sadness took over, filling him with wave after wave of it surrounding his very soul. He let out a terrible cry, the harsh sound breaking even his own heart.

Shakily, Lebrah raised once more to his paws. Sniffling, he ran a paw over his eyes to clear the path of tears away. He had to set a mission, to try and figure how just where he was. Shaking his head, he followed his own smell. It brought him to a small den, and poking his head in he could tell that this is where he had been living. But why had he forgotten everything? The very last thing he remembered was -- oh shit. The meditation, he had reverted himself back to a pup-like state. Oh gods, what had happened? Could he do it again? The pain was too much, too hard to handle. Backing up, Lebrah's head spun and he fell back onto his rump. His family, his poor family... Those cries would never leave his mind. He squeezed his eyes closed, muscles clenched as he rested his head on the side of the den. Could he live like this any longer? If he couldn't revert his mind back once again, he was afraid that he couldn't go on living.