She had left. She really, really left that pack; the pack she had been in since she arrived from her family. She left Natalya's side, the woman who had taken her in when she was younger. No, the woman was leaving her. Leaving, then dying. She didn't ask Hani for help, she didn't warn her. Natalya had simply cut her off at the meeting, so Hani had left. She was angry and hurt. Somehow over those sharp feelings, a numbness had clouded over her. She felt dead inside. Like a mouse that kicks and thrashes once or twice even after it has been killed.
She had to get rid of these feelings. She felt that if she didn't she would explode. Part of her wanted to lie down and rot to death while another part wanted to run and fight until she was too broken to move. Both were bad options, very bad options. What was a good option? Those plants that brute had shown her long ago. The ones that altered your feelings. Sometimes it was good, sometimes it was bad. Hani didn't care which she experienced. She found them and ate them heartily. The bitter herbs stung going down. Maybe she was eating them too fast, but that wouldn't matter in a moment. She took the extra time to drink some water and get away from the lake. She didn't care if she lived or died, but she didn't want to come off her high half way between. After being a safe distance away, the creamy girl plopped down haphazardly and waited for the medicinals to kick in.
