Everything that controls me [epiphron]
Sleeping was even a difficult thing now, she either slept too much or too little at times. This was one of those days she slept too much, when she fluttered her blue eyes open it was already maybe an hour past noon. If she wasn't careful, she would be labelled lazy, not that it mattered to her. Every morning she woke up, she wished her lungs had stopped functioning, but there was no escaping her fear of death anyhow. Her body weight may still have been low, but she was no longer a walking skeleton covered in wounds. It would take some time to return to her origonal weight, but she could function just fine now. Being able to hunt rabbits was far more satisfying than the small birds being the only thing she was able to handle before. Arian worried about Vereux, in the back of her mind she wanted him back, but she knew that wasn't a very smart idea. It wasn't her decision anyway, new masters came along but now she had to beg and plead the heavens didn't take her home away for a fourth time nor her family. Arian pulled herself out of her makeshift den near the waters, sighing she lowered her head to watch her reflection again. She didn't know why she did that; by some miracle maybe she'd return to have a pretty face and a functioning leg. There was no one to blame either, she had deliberately let it happen so she couldn't complain. The woman was far from innocent, she half was envious of her sister at times. With Athena, the one Arian had tried to be in love with, betrayed her trust and threw her into the garbage. Then again and again she tried to steal out the memory with the men in her slave days. She growled silently to herself, ears pulled against her skull as she slunk her tail underneath her. Frustration, an emotion she often felt upon herself.
Flopping down on the waters edge once more, she let the tips of her paws dip into the warm waters. She was grumpy, she knew because it was also her heat season. Another part of the reason she was avoiding people she always had since she arrived, but it was more of not wanting anyone near her for temptation and fear. That and she disliked touch, it would be some time until she allowed anyone to touch her, anyone at all. She let out another breath of air, trying to relax her heart beat. |