Blood On The Breeze

• -2   "The moment he was in close enough…" you need to attempt to close the distance between yourself and your opponent.  Also the words "close enough" could be elaborated on.  How close was he trying to get to her before pulling a feint?

• +1 for each seen

• +3 for bite +1 for grip -1 for clarity issue

• First round.

Esti:
10 for clarity:

• none seen, good work

• -2  I feel Esti should've taken more damage from that bite, between Vengeance's greater height and her own forward momentum  which she'd have had to stop.

• +1 for each

• +2 shoulder slam -1 If his jaws are under her it's likely she'd need to move back (and in), not forward to ram her shoulder into his face.  
• +1 paw stomp, point not given for maim attempt as it's unlikely the stomp could actually break bones.  Sprain would be more likely.
• +3 bite +1 grip attempt +1 maim attempt

• First round.

Vengeance:
5 for clarity:

• -1   which shoulder is he using to hold her weight?
• -2 what part of her body is in contact with his shoulder?  How is he positioned under her?  
• -1  "continuing straight at an angle"  I think I get the movement but it could still be clearer, especially as he is under her but his target is near side.
• -1  how great is the damage to the scruff?  It's not a shield so there was likely at least some damage but how much?  The notes you place at the bottom are for opponents, judges can only reference what is in the IC post.

• -2   You need to attempt to push against her hind legs

• +1 for each seen

• +2 push to topple, -2 for clarity and powerplay issues
• +3 bite

• -1 moderate bruising to shoulders
• -1 light wound to scruff

Esti:
8 for clarity:

• -1  A bit lost on how she's trying to push his face up when her body is currently over him
• -1 how is she angling her left leg to wrap both around the neck and behind the shoulders?

• -3 while they are close in height and size I don't think she could halt the movement of a larger wolf with just one paw, it would be another matter if was two or if she was throwing her chest into him, also you mention her weight is also balanced on her hind legs so it's not all being put into the paw, if that makes sense?

• +1 each seen

• +0 chest/shoulder shove, they're so close I don't see how this could really do damage
• +3 bite +1 grip, no points given for maim, the muscles of the neck are very thick it's unlikely she'd be able to break them in the first bite

• -2 moderate lacerations

Vengeance:
0 for clarity:

• -2 what part of him is he pushing into her?
• -2 what part of her body is he targeting this push?
• -1 you say he's going for a bite did he release his other grip?  We can't assume.
• -2 you need to be specific in your attacks, either he's going for a bite or trying to bump his jaws into hers, don't leave it open for your opponent or they'll be sure to pick the option with the least damage to their character
• -3 where on her jaws is he looking to bite?  The middle?  the corner?  upper or lower jaw? you then mention the nose.  You need to pick one specific target and go all in.

• -2  with his head as the fulcrum for his rotation I don't see how he could avoid her bite entirely, she would likely have bitten flesh before he managed to shuffle all that way.
• -2 you need to attempt to push into her

• +1 for each seen

• +1 for bite?, points deducted for numerous clarity issues
• +0 shove, points deducted for clarity issues

• -0 for light bruising to face
• -2 bite would (judges determined damage, see first pp note)

Esti:
9 for clarity:

• -1
how is she rotating? Is she shuffling?  you mention springy legs did she hop around?  

• -2  I don't feel that her turning her head is enough movement for the attack to only pick off loose fluff and cause a pinch
• -2
 A wolves forelimbs are not that strong where as they're necks are very strong, snapping a wolves neck with the forelimbs is just not possible.  It's also highly unlikely she could cause him to strangle by putting pressure on the back of his neck rather than the front.

• +1 each seen

• +0 claw attack, wolves claws aren't sharp enough to do significant damage through all the fur on the neck
• +3 bite +1 grip
• +0 neck snapping, due to powerplay issues

• -2 moderate lacerations to face (judges deduction)  

• Minor wound to scruff  (5 ooc days to heal)
• Moderate bruises to shoulders (5 ooc days to heal)
• Moderate bite to neck (2 ooc weeks to heal)
• Severe wound/maim to ear (4 ooc weeks to heal)

• Minor wound to chest (5 ooc days to heal)
• Moderate wounds to cheek and upperarm (2 ooc weeks to heal)