- 2 "would try to shift her body slightly to her left so that her right shoulder jutted out. Aiming it to his lower neck as she attempted to press her full weight into him" (where on his lower neck? Chest region-ish? What side?)
+ 3 shoulder throw into jaws
+ 2 paw pin (due to size difference)
+ 4 bite/grip attempt behind ears
Total: 9
INJURIES
- First round!
Total: 10
Total for Round One: 49 / 50
ROUND TWO
RENHETT
CLARITY
- 2 "her left forepaw lifting up as she attempted to shift to her left so they were at an obtuse angle." (how does just lifting a forepaw move her whole body? Did she skid or hop her move her hind limbs at all?)
- 2 "Feeling his right forepaw scratching the midsection" (Midsection of what? Her chest? How did a toe slam go to her chest?)
- 2 "the pain erupting from her snout did not deter her" (From what, her nose? her jaw? was there blood?)
Total: 4
POWERPLAY
- 1 "using her left forearm to hook his own left leg" (Must always always be an attempt)
+ 4 bite and grip attempt to left neck
+ 1 leg hold
Total: 5
INJURIES
- 2 moderate bruising to nose plus nosebleed
- 1 shoulder bruising
- 3 scruff wound
Total: 6
Total for Round Two: 30 / 50
VALENTINE
CLARITY
- 2 “rolling his left shoulder forward, the King kicked forward in hopes of ramming the bony front of it into the lower portion of Renhett’s throat” (Renhett is biting your lower neck and you have nearly a foot on her. The height difference doesn’t seem possible to just ram unless you lower first?)
+ 2 head shake/grip worsening
+ 3 shoulder ram into throat
+ 1 worsen nose hit
Total: 6
INJURIES
- 2 right shoulder tears
- 3 left neck grip
Total: 5
Total for Round Two: 39 / 50
Totals:
RENHETT
40 + 30 = 70 / 100
VALENTINE
49 + 39 = 88 / 100
And the winner is...
VALENTINE
Renhett must give up by submitting, fleeing or passing out.
Damage:
RENHETT
- moderate to severe nose bruising plus nose bleed - 2 ooc weeks to fully heal, tender until
- mild shoulder bruising - 1 ooc week
- moderate lacerations to neck scruff - 2 ooc weeks to heal naturally
VALENTINE
- moderate lacerations to left neck above shoulder - 2 ooc weeks to heal
- mild to moderate tears along right shoulder - 1-2 ooc weeks to fully heal
Notes:
Tips for writing and some suggestions. (no points are deducted here):
RIVS
You lost a lot of useful points in your defenses! Keep in mind every region of the wolf, I sing the head and shoulders knees and toes song as I go along to remember them all. The more defenses you have the more points you have! Also, be sure to fully specify where exactly you are aiming your attack as well as where Valen's moves are hitting exactly. Remember to be realistic in your movements, especially when dodging attack, and be very specific when it comes to pain and damage you take! Spars need to be very specific, more so than any other IC posts so everything is very clear.
LAZ
As always, you are a beast. Remember, Valen's height is both a severe advantage, as well as a disadvantage when it comes to aiming. You gotta bend down sometimes. Defenses and powerplay was always spot on! I don't really have much to say, keep being awesome.
