HYDER vs SIN for SPAR
ROUND ONE
HYDER
CLARITY |
- 2 “using both paws outwards aiming for Sin’s sides” (You don’t specify which paws, front or back, where on the sides you’re aiming or what paws on which sides. Must be specific)
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Total: 8 |
POWERPLAY |
- 1 “would crouch and then run towards the canine” (Must attempt, attempt, attempt all movement that involves the other opponent.)
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Total: 9 |
DEFENSES |
+ 1 (tail) + 1 (eyes) + 1 (nails) + 1 (crouch) + 1 (muscles) + 1 (paws)
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Total: 6 |
ATTACK |
+ 4 grip claw attempt along sides
+ 3 bite and grip attempt on neck
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Total: 7 |
INJURIES |
- First round!
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Total: 10 |
Total for Round One: 40 / 50
SIN
CLARITY |
- 1 " (scratch more like since wolf claws aren't that sharp *cough*) " OOC notes in a spar post are not required, you could have easily changed sliced to scratched to avoid confusion. Avoid unnecessary notes like this.
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Total: 9 |
DEFENSES |
+ 1 ( eyes) + 1 (teeth) + 1 (ears) + 1 (hackles) + 1 (head) + 1 (tail) + 1 (toes) + 1 (nails) + 1 (shoulders) + 1 (knees)
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Total: 10 |
ATTACK |
+ 3 bite and grip attempt to neck
+ 1 scratch attempt
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Total: 4 |
INJURIES |
- First round!
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Total: 10 |
Total for Round One: 43 / 50
ROUND TWO
HYDER
CLARITY |
- 2 “Aiming to scoot to his right” (with his hind legs? Are both paws in the air? How did he “scoot”?)
- 2 “As he continued his charge forward” (wasn’t Hyder reared on his back paws? You don’t mention creating any distance for this "charging", you just had a grip on Sin. How are you charging?)
- 1 “raising his right paw to attempt to hold his back” (where along his back? What part? Claws and all?)
- 2 “aiming for the creatures spine just below his left paw” (Where exactly are you trying to bite? Where are you aiming your teeth??)
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Total: 3 |
POWERPLAY |
- 2 You scratched with your left paw and attempted a hold with the same paw. You didn’t give sin enough time to react.
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Total: 8 |
DEFENSES |
+ 1 (tail) + 1 (balance) + 1 (toes)
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Total: 3 |
ATTACK |
+ 3 eye scratch
+ 1 paw hold along back
+ 3 bite and grip attempt along back
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Total: 7 |
INJURIES |
- 1 slight lacerations to neck under jaw
- 1 slight scratches along underbelly
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Total: 8 |
Total for Round Two: 29 / 50
SIN
CLARITY |
- 1 "then he probably could...*cough*" ( OOC notes are not necessary and are generally not allowed in IC posts. You do not need to post this sort of thing, it can cause confusion.)
- 2" He strove to charge beneath" (with how much distance was between you two you didn't explain how you had enough time to open your eyes, see the charge, reset your defenses, and then charge to avoid Hyder's attacks. Hyder was JUST close enough to scratch your face, where was the time?)
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Total: 7 |
POWERPLAY |
- 2 "He would mostly be beneath the cat" - you have to attempt these things, not just assume.
- 2 "lifted his left paw to claw down his left leg this time" - attempt attempt attempt attempt. Always attempt everything. "To" is not an attempt unless its preceeded by "attempt" "aimed" or "tried" ect.
- 1 "rip into the softer underbelly, to cause pain and hopefully attain a solid grip and shake" (There’s a lot of motion here for one move. We normally do a bite in one post and then the shake in the second post.)
- 1 "Sin would swing his body towards his own right then" (Sin is moving a lot! He’s already running forward, there’s just not enough time in seconds to do so many movements in one post.)
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Total: 4 |
DEFENSES |
+ 1 (ears) + 1 (hackles) + 1 (tail) + 1 (knees) + 1 (toes) + 1 (claws) + 1 (head) + 1 (weight) + 1 (shoulders) + 1 (maw)
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Total: 10 |
ATTACK |
+ 3 bite and grip attempt along underbelly
+ 1 underbelly scratch attempt
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Total: 4 |
INJURIES |
- 2 moderate lacerations along face
- 1 bruising along back
- 2 moderate bite to left thigh/back
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Total: 5 |
Total for Round Two: 30 / 50
Totals:
And the winner is...
SIN |
Hyder must give up by submitting, fleeing or passing out.
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Damage:
HYDER |
- Moderate lacerations under jaw - 2 ooc weeks
- moderate lacerations along under belly - 2 ooc weeks
- scratches along left and right inner leg - 2 ooc days
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SIN |
- Scratching near right eyes - 1 ooc week
- Scratching/moderate lacerations along left shoulder - 2 ooc weeks
- Bite on right shoulder, down to the bone. - 2 ooc weeks to heal, requires a healer or will scar dramatically.
- bruising along back - 1 ooc week to heal
- moderate lacerations to left thigh/back - 2 ooc weeks to heal
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Notes:
Tips for writing and some suggestions. (no points are deducted here):
RIVS | You must give time to react between moves! The basic rule of thumb is 1 attack per body part, so keep track of attacks with left paws and right paws. Remember your characters positioning as well in relation to your opponent and avoid words that bring confusion about distance and speed. You lost a lot of easy points on defenses, I generally go through the head and shoulders knees and toes song. Lion defenses are a tad different from wolf defenses, but in essance they are the same! So make sure you are absolutely clear how to defend your fluffy lil kitty.
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DRAGON | Don't put ooc notes of any kind in your IC post, this includes *coughs*. Its not necessary and it causes confusion! Attempt every move, don't assume. Spars have to be very specific, more so than normal IC posts so that your opponent knows exactly what you're doing. You must give time to react, and remember seconds are only so long, so don't try to fit too much movement in there that your opponent has to react too. Over doing movements is considered PP because your wolf can only move so fast.
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- By [Arin]
