Another attempt at an Apology

When he looked up at her, he could see the frustration and impatience etched all over her features. It reminded him of the same look she'd had when he would delay a lesson with a small conversation. She had never been one for patience...that had always been his job. Now he found it a hard to be patient with anyone as he had been hard on himself since she had run away. The last thing he wanted was to do or say anything that would make her run away again but, making her run seemed to be one of his growing specialties. Silently sad blue orbs would watch as frustration would change to disbelief.

She acted as though he had just flat out lied to her. Even her line of questioning filled with the tone she laced it with told him that's how she felt. Slowly he would give her a small nod before looking away from her again. "The past gives me no reason to believe you would ever let me have you any other way, so yes friendship is what I'm asking for. You have run away from a confession that was never meant to happen and you made me talk to a cat so I could help you because you wouldn't talk to me out of hatred or fear or what ever you were feeling." slowly he would turn his gaze back on her. "My apology is as stands. I never meant to fall in love with you, I am sorry I ever told you, I'm sorry I wasn't there to protect you when you needed it most, and I'm sorry for trying when you came back. I'm sorry I cant change the way I feel about you, believe me I've tired. Hell I did everything I could think of and I tried to stay way from you but I couldn't and for that I'm sorry. I am apologizing for everything I have ever done to hurt you, everything I didn't do to help you but should have and for the way I feel. "

He would stand again, but only to move a bit further away as if to beg her not to run away. To show her that he would not touch her, wouldn't even try to come closer and to show her that if she told him to leave and never speak to her again then he would, reluctantly leave and stay away to the best of his ability. His eyes would search her features as they pleaded her to listen, to actually hear what he was saying, not just to hear what she wanted. "Please believe me. Remember who I am and who I always will be. I would never, ever try to force you to do anything you didn't want to do. I have never tried to hurt you and I would never do so perpously. I love you, but I have never touched you and I wont until you give me permission.

Again the dark man would look away from her only this time it would be to close his eyes and clench his teeth before speaking again. No matter how I feel, I don't know how you feel about me, though I've been pretty positive that you hate me, I know for a fact that I cant make you love me. Hell I don't want you to pretend to love me, I don't even want you to pretend to like me. Truthfully I don't want you in any way but the way you would have me. Yes I would love to be your mate, I wouldn't mind having children with you but if you don't want any of that then I wont ask it of you." He would look at her again this time the guilt had faded from him and was replaced a mixture pleading and loving eyes. Fear of her running away had not left him, nor had fear of her actually hating him. His apology had been given along with an explanation for his request of friendship.