see you again
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Some time had passed since he had spent time with his oceanic friend, and things were now a little different. An adult he now was, entering a new stage of his life though she herself wasn't far behind. Had he really known her for this entire year - four seasons? It seemed untrue, though he remained glad that their friendship had lasted so long, and would hopefully continue in the future.
So he found her noticeable blue form sitting by the rapids, dipping her paws into the water. Chestnut limbs carried him over, where he greeted her before sitting back on his haunches. "Hey," he softly murmured, hoping not to disturb her thoughtful state. A year ago, he would have been frightened of the rapids and the dark history behind them though now he found himself calmed by the water, like as if his father's presence brought a soothing aura over him.
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Avatar Credit goes to euphoriclies on dA/Sarah on RoW
Her inquiry brought a perplexed state over his mind. A rabbit for his thoughts? Did she mean that literally or was that another saying that he hadn't ever heard of? Although his mind had spiked with confusion, he wouldn't allow that to be shown to his friend. He totally knew what it meant, yeah, he could definitely answer her in a normal way. Think, Tinaro, think. What did she mean? Perhaps she just wanted him to elaborate his thoughts; no rabbit involved. That did disappoint him a bit, as he was looking forward to some sort of hunt. Oh well, maybe he could bring that up later.
"Well, I've been thinking about the siege lately..." he slowly dragged the words from his throat, like as if they clung to him, wishing to be unspoken. When he turned to look into her gaze, he remembered seeing her in battle, fighting down one of the enemies though the outcome of that fight he hadn't seen. "You did well, by the way," he commented with an encouraging smile, a dark cloud of depression falling over his thoughts momentarily. If only he had found an opponent that day; he just stood there looking for one. Was it because he was one of the last to arrive, as he had stuck to the back of the crowd unable to push through to the front? If only he could have been more confident, perhaps then he would have joined into a group fight. However, that wasn't the case, and here he was now, overwhelmed by guilt and disappointment in himself. Abaven was victorious, but was he as well?
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Avatar Credit goes to euphoriclies on dA/Sarah on RoW
It was when she corrected him and explained that she had taken the wrong turn, and paid the price, that his heart fell. Fighting is a matter of skill and strength, yes, though there is a bit of chance involved as well. Like she had stated, she had taken a risk, one that ultimately decided the outcome of the battle. How is one to guess what their opponent is exactly thinking, or how strong or strategical they are? The male couldn't decide which he preferred: to fight and to lose or to not fight at all? Both carried a heavy burden, though he found it best to encourage his friend to persevere in fighting. "Don't let that get to you," he told her softly, shuffling closer so their shoulders could gently meet. "From your mistakes you can become a better fighter."
Then the inquiry was turned back at him. He had been expecting it, though dreading it nonetheless. He quietly inhaled and exhaled, clearing his mind from the frantic thoughts causing him to stress and worry. She'd understand, wouldn't she? They were friends, after all. Somehow, that wasn't enough to convince him. "I was at the back when we were making our way over. By the time I arrived, there was no-one left to fight," he croaked, vocals hoarse and dry. His head turned away from her gaze, hanging his crown in guilt and shame. "I should have been at the front. I should have at least joined into a group spar. But no." In that moment as he said that word, he dug his claws into the ground and clenched his teeth - a way to release a quick burst of anger. "I blew it."
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Avatar Credit goes to euphoriclies on dA/Sarah on RoW
She didn't appear thoroughly convinced by his encouragement, which he briefly frowned at. There was only so much he could to help; he couldn't force a positive attitude on her. Like her, he too wasn't entirely assured by her words when her turn came to motivate him away from depression. The consideration he admired, though he wasn't bouncing up and down with glee. His mind had been slightly eased off of the guilt as he recalled the many Imperium wolves aiding in the siege. There had to be others who didn't seize the opportunity to fight, which comforted him a bit. "I guess you're right," he softly admitted, vocals calmer yer stronger. At least she hadn't taunted him, not that he thought she would do that. "Let's move on from the past. I'm sure we have a bright future ahead of us."
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Taking her paw out from the water, she rose to her feet - his cue to suggest something. "How about we take a walk?" he inquired, now standing beside her. There was no better remedy for a sore mind than a walk; it calmed his thoughts yet occupied his paws. Originally he had been considering the possibility of training with the female - nothing large or intense, perhaps a rundown on defences or attacks. Though now it seemed he was in no state to fight - physically and mentally. Strangely enough, he was feeling a bit fatigued, the energy drained from his system. His mind was no better; he just needed to clear it, maybe socialise more with his friend, if she agreed to his proposition, that is.
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Avatar Credit goes to euphoriclies on dA/Sarah on RoW
She silently agreed to his suggestion, and so they began to their walk. Trotting alongside her, he originally planned to bring up an inquiry to bring the conversation back to life though she beat him to it with a more...intriguing query. It really stumped him - did he consider Abaven as a family? "Well, there's the Destruction family," Everyone knew about that family, and Tinaro himself was friends with a couple of those canines. They were everything he ever wanted in his own family. Siblings that got along, a high-ranking father, a huge and famous lineage, a special bondage and of course, no deaths. Secretly, he envied them. Just his luck to be an orphan and have his brothers ditch him for a rogue life. "They're a family. Like, they're the kind of family I wish I had." Maybe that wasn't what she was talking about, so he quickly added, "But overall, with the Destructions and everyone else...a family? I don't know. If that's what Abaven is supposed to be - a family - then I ain't feeling it." He wasn't feeling that sense of support and togetherness from the pack as a whole. Sure, he never really had a family himself, but even in those few months he shared with his mother and brothers he felt those warm feelings. His oceanic friend modelled those traits, and he was thankful for that. If it wasn't for a select few wolves who he had taken a liking to, he would have seriously considered following his brother into the loner territories - abandoning pack-life. "What about you?" Perhaps she thought differently, though he didn't expect her to.
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Avatar Credit goes to euphoriclies on dA/Sarah on RoW
Ah, that's right. That was what brought them together, made the two click together, creating a bondage between them. Their lack of a family and troubled past, though his was a bit milder. However they had grown up, they both ended up in Abaven and their paths had entwined. After she had spoken, he could understand her view and was starting to lean towards her opinion. Without Abaven, where would he be now? How would he have been able to deal with the loss of his loved ones as a loner, not around a bustling atmosphere of many souls? "Now that you mention it, I can relate to what you're saying. Abaven gave me the opportunity to preserve with my life, even after I thought there was nothing left to live for," he murmured, quickly sending a small and silent prayer to his parents. "I'm glad my parents chose to come to Abaven." Maybe that was why they came. Maybe they knew their days were numbered, so they decided raising their children into a pack would be ideal. Don't think like that, he told himself. Of course they would have wanted to see you grow. Dad never even got to see you! Shaking his fallen head, he softly added, "I wish my brothers could have seen that in Abaven - an opportunity, but no, they had to leave on their own accord,"
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Avatar Credit goes to euphoriclies on dA/Sarah on RoW
Unlike her, it hadn't been his choice to join Abaven though there was no other pack he imagined growing up in. His parents might have stayed in Tortuga, or might have been accepted into Ludicael if the empire hadn't been so overpopulated. In fact, they could have given up but in the end, Abaven shone promise and here he was now.
He gave a small nod, agreeing with her comment on Abaven being not-so-perfect. Nothing was perfect or flawless, especially when it came down to Abaven's togetherness and unity between the Destructions and those not. Then she inquired about his family - had he not told her already? "Well, I never met my father. He, uh, drowned in the rapids when a storm swept over Abaven," he hesitated with this response, gesturing with his head to the water that they had sat beside not long ago. "But I bet he was a good guy or how else would Mum have liked him?" His vocals remained light and optimistic, a small smile creeping to his lips as he recalled the memories tucked away in the depths of his mind. "Then there was my mother, a caring woman by what I can remember." He didn't mention what brought her to her death. The scene was vivid in his mind, like it was engraved. A sickening disease, blood coughed from her throat, and three little pups huddled around her form - one that was trembling in tears - Tinaro. "Last, my brothers, Alvin and Mingan. I looked up to Alvin, we were like best buddies. I liked Mingan as well, but not as much as my other brother. They both left anyway." Yup, a great family.
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Her parents are, or had been, alphas. Sometimes he wondered what it would have been liked if his own mother or father had ruled Abaven, or if he was a part of a well-known lineage. He couldn't ever imagine himself being a Destruction, even if he ironically carried a nose stripe. Then again, Lastics were nobodies - it was just his father's family name, nothing special. Well, now that he thought about it, maybe he could turn into his name into something famous, like a legend. He didn't know how he'd do that, but he would. Definitely.
She also mentioned many siblings, including sisters. Three rambunctious boys were probably enough for his mother, but what would a sister have been like? Maybe two sisters, if his parents were around to bring in a younger litter into the world. Would she have been like Calypsei? Would she have left as well? "What's it like to have a sister?" he asked curiously, expecting it to be better than having two brothers who fought all the time.
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Avatar Credit goes to euphoriclies on dA/Sarah on RoW
He was hoping for her to know what it had been like with a sister, though after her response he realised she had come to Abaven a season old so that didn't leave much time to remember anything. Imagine that - leaving home as a young pup into the great unknown, not knowing what a family was. The man couldn't ever see himself doing that, even now as an adult. Yes, the pack had its moments and wasn't always sunny, though it was where he would stay. "But you do now, don't you?" he softly asked, seeking her fallen, saddened blue gaze. "Abaven is your family. I'm a part of that family." Or, well, the closest to a family that she had.