He sat atop a pile of rubble. It was lumpy and certainly one of the worst things to pick for a perch. Something was poking him in the stomach. He didn’t care though. This pile was taller than the rest, and here he was a king. He glanced around, surveying his kingdom. The afternoon light painted orange and yellow along pieces of trash, giving all the feeling of a mosaic. The imp licked his lips, his face blank. Nobody was here. It felt empty. It made him feel a bit bad… But… maybe he could just imagine his subjects in. The mind was a great creator sometimes. ”Hmmm,” he hummed aloud in thought. ”Uh. A guard there, and there. And Brutus there. Grand counsel-master Brutus,” he mentally placed them here and there as he spoke. Great. What a great kingdom this would be!

He pushed his paws into the trash a little and licked his lips again. Then he dipped his head down and nipped at his precious – his crinkly! After spending a good amount of time in the debris-filled land, he had made an emotional reunion with his crinkly (it probably wasn’t the very same piece of clear plastic he had found months ago, but he was rather convinced that it was). He nibbled at it a little, listened to it crinkle, and felt reassured. It was like his King’s scepter, and would be used to strike down any disobedient subjects. Metaphorically, of course. He glanced over the area one more time, and then began to burrow his nose in the plastic.

B, Just B

This place wasn't as nice as the others that B had found, oh no. But there were still things, many many things! The crow could sort through the pile for ages to find his shinies, and even if it took him all day it was always worth it. He would do anything for his shinies, anything! Oh yes, yes, time to find more! He cawed as he circled around a smaller pile, a glint of something catching his yellow eyes. What was that? A new thing to collect, could it be? Flapping his wings in excitement he lowered his feet from his belly, landing with a hop or two until he settled on the unstable surface. Mm, now where was that thing that shone? Was it a gem, or metal? Ohh he was so excited to see! Cawing again his feathers ruffled in delight as his beak picked through the trash, until he tasted the bitterness of something metallic on his tongue. There it was, there it was! He grasped it in his clutches, pulling his head up to drop it on the top of the pile. Drat, oh darn. This was no shiny thing! This was a fake shiny, he had seen it before! It crumpled up like paper, but it was shiny and tasted like metal. It was often in little balls, fooling the bird into thinking that he could add it to his collection. No! Stupid fake shiny! He picked it up with his beak again, taking off to the skies in order to give it the death it deserved. Yes it wasn't alive, but B didn't care. It needed to die for fooling him! So he took it and tossed his head back and forth until it fell, and B circled around to watch it fall.

Right on a woof.

Startled, B flapped higher into the air to stay out of the wolf's reach, cawing in alarm as his fake shiny struck the creature. "Oh, B is sorry! B was trying to kill fake shiny, caw! B did not mean to hit the woof! Don't eat B! B doesn't taste good!" He assured the creature, still staying well away from its mouth.

Crinkle, crinkle. Crinkle. It was a nice sound. He paid no heed to the distant cries of a bird; it was normal background noise, and really, he wouldn’t have given much attention to anything beyond his current favorite sound. So it came as a complete surprise when something smacked him right on the top of the head. He shrieked – complete shock making him react to something of minimal pain as if he had just been stabbed. He leaped into the air and flailed as though he’d just been struck by lightning, flinging his plastic a few feet down his hill of trash. His nerves pulsed, communicating the utter terror of overstimulated neurons. Seconds later, when he processed that he wasn’t actually hurt, he laid still on his stomach, panting, heart pounding. Something called to him from above, and with wide eyes he turned to stare up.

A… bird? ”Eh?” he squeaked. He wasn’t sure how to feel about this. He stared for a second, blinking. Fake shiny? He glanced back down and noticed a mildly metallic object. That must have been what hit him. ”K-…kay,” he called back loudly. He hesitantly put a paw out, and then on the thing. It smushed down flat with little resistance. ”It’s dead! Cesar smashed it!” he informed. It was kinda fun.

B, Just B

The wolf shrieked and B flew higher, almost leaving completely. His heart beat in his tiny chest, and if he didn't feel some sort of small burst of pride at hurting a mighty woof he just might have left. But... B was oddly proud of himself. Those creatures ruled the lands now, and they often tried to eat him. And call him stupid. B was not stupid though, he did it! He hurt the mighty woof! With a victory call he landed a few feet away from the now stunned dog, his head turning to and fro. Green striped feathers bobbed atop his head as he studied the wolf, who did not seem to be hurt at all. Oh boy. B's wings stretched out at his side, and he was ready to take off as soon as the beast made a move. But he just sat there, and moved a paw to flatten the fake shiny. A murmur like caw left his throat, a birdy sigh, and he hopped a bit closer to eye the dead shiny. "The woof did it! Fake shiny is dead! Oh B is thanking you for helping, many woofs do not help B. They call B names and throw things at B, which makes B very sad. And mad, caw! Cause B is a big scary crow, you see? Woof sees?" He asked, hopping back and forth in front of the black creature. Right away he liked this woof, this one called Cesar. He killed fake shiny and did not try to eat him, yet. And there was no name calling, not yet. Oh no, this woof seemed... different. Almost kind of like B, but not really. Cause B was a bird and Cesar was a woof, so not really the same. But close, close! Oh yes, a friend! Could it be? He may be jumping ahead of himself, but B did not have many friends, not since Twig woof went away with her mate woof.

The imp’s haunting gaze flickered over to the side to study the now landed bird. It hopped over with little quick motions, the fancy plumage on its head bobbing funnily. And how interesting! It had green in its feathers! Cesar blinked. Had the thing not been talking, and had he figured that it had no meat on it anyways, he probably would have tried to eat it. But here it was, eying the squashed foil. It commented excitedly, sounding… comfortingly familiar. It talked very much like he did, although he didn’t really make the connection. It was still enjoyed though. The bird exclaimed how he had “done it,” making it sound as though he had accomplished some wonderful feat. Cesar liked that very much. He glanced back to the metallic object, and back to the bird.

Upon hearing the rest of what it had to say, the little wolf gasped. Name calling and being mean?! Why, that was just what they did to him! ”Oh yes!” he nodded feverishly. ”They are mean to Cesar too! They are all bigger than Cesar, and so that makes them think that they can be mean to him. But he bites them!” he explained, feeling a sudden and unusually genuine connection with the creature. He nodded more. ”B… is its name? B is a very big and smart crow,” he lathered on the compliments easily, wanting very suddenly to be friends with this thing. ”Does B like crinklies?” he questioned, tilting his head.

B, Just B

To B the wolf was just like any other, as he was not well versed in the ways of the wolves. They were all big and potentially scary to the crow, even though he was much bigger than others. Oh yes, B was a very special crow! And this woof, he was very special too. He seemed like B, and talked like he knew him. So he didn't feel too scared any more, his wings folding against his sides as he stood at his full height. The woof seemed intent on the fake shiny, and B's beady yellow eyes narrowed at the false shiny. Stupid thing!

When Cesar spoke with a gasp, B let out a soft caw. Woof was just like B the bird! "Woofs are mean! They mean to B and mean to Cesar, caw! Cesar is not tiny, and B knows that Cesar bites hard! But woof B's friend, and no bite B, right?" he asked, uncertainty in his rough voice. He asked to confirm his name, and B's head bobbed up and down. "Yes, B is B and nothing more!" When the wolf complimented him the feathers on his face fluffed up slightly, wings quivering at his side slightly. "Oh, woof is very nice to B! B likes friend Cesar. Does Cesar like shiny things?" He asked, only to be asked a question in return. Head cooked to the side as his eyes looked at the black woof, blinking slowly. "But does not know what crinklies is, caw! What's crinklies?" He asked, hopping a bit closer.

The excited talking of B in turn made Cesar more excited. He sat up where he was, his mouth slightly unhinged and his eyes wide as he listened intently, and nodded every so often in agreement. ”Yes, yes, friends! Oh, Cesar loves friends!” he crooned, half sounding like he was about to cry from the joy. What a wonderful day this was! What wonderful luck, to get hit in the head and find a new friend! He watched the interesting creature fluff its feathers. It asked if he liked shiny things, and he nodded. ”Oh yes! And there are lots of shiny things here!” B then asked about the crinkly, and Cesar grinned broadly, excited to show someone else his most favorite thing (well, second to bloodbaths and gore). He had tried to show Brutus, but… they hadn’t been able to find it last time they were together. He stood up and walked a few paces down the pile to find where the crinkly had gone. ”Here, here,” he beckoned, bending down to nose at it. ”It makes a good noise when it’s bitten… or poked, or moved or anything.” He hoped his newfound friend would like it too.

B, Just B

B felt like he had almost found his soul mate, even if it was with a woof-dog. It was better than none, and this woof was just like B! Both spoke the same, both were black, and both likes shiny things and things that made fun sounds. They seemed to feed off of each other's excitement, making B caw loudly as his wings fluttered at his side. Oh yes, yes! More friends for B, all the friends for B! Cesar liked shiny things and said that there were lots of those here, making the birds head shoot upwards as he tried to spy down things that shone in the dim winter light. His clawed feet grabbed at the garbage blow him in his excitement, heart fluttering at the prospect of finding something new with his even newer friend. Cesar moved off to find his crinkly thing, leaving B to hop behind him as the two defended down the pile a bit. When it was pointed out to him, B pecked at it with his beak, hearing the crinkly sound that the woof promised it made. "Oh, oh! B likes this crinklies things, B likes them lots!" he called happily. But that made him want to show something of his off! "Oi, Oi! It's B's turn, B's turn now!" he called, hopping a bit as he spread his wings and took to the sky. "Friend Cesar wait here, B will be back!" he called down to the wolf.

B flew a little bit off to the tree that he had hid his shiny in, yellow eyed glancing every which way for his marker. When he saw the marks in the tree he had made, he called with excitement before fluttering over to it, grasping the metal chain gently in his jaws. Without waiting long he took off again, flapping as fast as he could back to his new friend. When he arrived he landed beside the woof, carefully placing the chain on Cesar's paws. "See, shiny, caw! "

B made his crow noises – something Cesar wished he could do. It was a guttural and grating sound, the kinds Cesar made often, and therefore liked. As B stated that he too liked the crinkly, the imp bounced on his toes, tittering with delight. His grin stretched like some macabre puppet’s – unfortunately a horrifying way of displaying his utter joy in the situation. It felt so, so very nice to share something with someone – even a feeling. The bird then claimed that it was his turn, and went off to find something. Cesar stood and waited with unusual patience, watching as B flew off and briefly wishing that he could fly. How fun that would be. He had never thought about it until now. What a shame it was, that he didn’t have wings…

He continued to grin at being called “friend,” his tail wagging steadily as he saw B return with something in his beak. It was indeed shiny, and when he set it down in front of Cesar, he regarded it with wide eyes and an open mouth. ”Oh. It is very shiny. Can Cesar touch it?” he asked, running his tongue over his teeth. He was under the impression that this was something important of B’s, since he had not seen him pick it from the trash, but rather leave to find it elsewhere.

B, Just B

B was very excited to show off his treasures, it wasn't often that he found someone who took so much pleasure in shiny things. Cesar asked to touch it as he licked his sharp tooths, and B regarded his new friend with beady eyes. He made a soft grunting sound, hopping from foot to foot. He trusted Cesar friend, and he nodded his head, feathers dancing on his head. "Friend Cesar can touch, but Cesar needs to be gentle! B likes his shiny things!" he called. B stretched his neck upwards to get a closer look at the woofs toothies, seeing them shine brightly in the dim light. "Friend Cesar has scary teethies. B had no teeth, and wants teethies like woof! How B get woof teeth?" he asked with a tilt of his head. He would be scary then! No one would make fun of B or friend Cesar!

He listened intently and nodded again. ”Of course, of course, will be careful,” he promised. He then leaned down to sniff at it, and then gently prod it with his nose. It was cold and smooth on the links. Strange. He liked it though. Deciding that touching it with his nose was probably enough (he didn’t want to upset B) he straighten and smiled. ”Very nice. Maybe they can find more shinies.” Maybe he could get one of his own, and find more for B if the bird liked.

When B observed his teeth and commented, Cesar would grin again, somewhat proud to have them. The crow asked about how to get teeth, and Cesar would hop into the air a little with an idea. His grin broadened. ”They can find another wolf and take them!” he exclaimed. ”Rip them out of their head! Then B can have all the teeth,” he said, excited to think of an idea that both involved violence and his new friend.

B, Just B

He was very watchful of Cesar woof as he poked at his shiny with his nose, but his new friend was very gentle with his precious chain. B let out a soft crone, his head leaning down as he picked up his shiny in his beak, carefully wrapping the chain around one of his wings so that he wouldn't lose it. And then the black wolf suggested finding more shinies, and the birds eyes opened wider. "Friend Cesar would help look for shinies? Oh, oh, Cesar is the best woof in the world!" he cawed, head tilting to the side as he fondly ran his feathered head down Cesar's leg with a coo. They could find lots of shinies with two pair of eyes! All the shinies!

They moved on to teethies, and B found his feathers fluffing up at Cesar's suggestion. "Takes them, we takes them!" he mimicked in his guttural fashion. How pretty would he look with woof teeths? "Maybe they can make a necklace out of teef, and wear them to show the world that B and Cesar are friends!" He shook with excitement, even though he didn't think about the prospect of violence. B might be a carrion bird, but violence scared him. It was because he was so small and tiny, and most tried to eats him! So he stayed away from danger. But the prospect of getting teethies was all he could think about.